Burning Hatred (Camren)

▫️Chapter One~ Dearest...You▪️

Dear You,
It has been three months since I left. I wonder if you still think of me? Do you even remember me? I don't know that answer and I'm afraid to know I guess... that's why I'm writing to you right? I told myself I wouldn't write, that I would let go, forget you, pretend you don't exist. Well you see how that's gone clearly. You're my personal form of cocaine and I can't stay sober... And yes I'm afraid to address you by your real name because well.. Then it makes this real and I want it to be a dream.. I want to wake up and see a text or missed call from you or better yet, I want to see you next to me. But I can't and I won't because this isn't a dream it's very much real and I hate it.. You are truly amazing you know.. and maybe one day... Just maybe.. one day we can see each other again? Just maybe we can reattach to each other like we used to. I'm sorry that I hurt you. I'm so sorry I never wanted to. I was trying to keep you safe and I am anything but that. I am a ticking time bomb and we both know it.. I'm so sorry. But you see I realized that I have nothing to lose except possibilities so I decided write. I'm sorry..

Yours forever,
Lauren

Lauren sighed deeply and rested her head on her arm. "God damn it!" She screamed looking up and throwing her pen at the wall so forcefully that when she looked to severe she threw it that there was black ink splattered everywhere. "I..mi-miss you..." She sobbed aloud. Memories running through her mind one thousand miles per second. "St-stop i-it sto-stop pl-ee please stop." She cried putting her hands over her ears desperate to stop the songs from playing.

"I've been sleeping with the lights on
Cause the darkness is surrounding you
This is my world, this is my choice
And you're the drug that gets me through

I've been waiting for an answer
Because I built this bed for two
I'm just hanging on your answer
I built this bed for me and you

Can't you see that I am yours?
So will you be my life support?
You're my life support
You're my life support

Sick of waking up in darkness
When the sky is always painted blue
There's a method to my madness
It's clear that you don't have a clue

I've been waiting for an answer
Because I built this bed for two
I'm just hanging on your answer
I built this bed for me and you

Can't you see that I am yours?
So will you be my life support?
You're my life support
You're my life support
You're my life support
You're my life support

Can't you see that I am yours?
So will you be my life support?
I've been sleeping with the lights on
Cause the darkness is surrounding you"

Every song reminding Lauren of.... Her.

   With shaky hands, Lauren grabbed the clean, white envelope to her left, folded the letter and quickly looked for a new pen since the other was now useless. Once she found a black ink pen in the drawer of her mahogany desk she wrote in scribbled script "Camila". She then wrote down the address where she last knew Camila lived all the while crying. She then found a stamp that seemed like a monster to Lauren, but she still took it and put it on the corner of the envelope, heart beating out of her chest all the while. She shoved the envelope in her back right pants pocket swiftly moving to the door, grabbing her jacket off the door hanger, wiped her eyes one last time and put on a fake smile. She then continued to exit her apartment building and made her way to her dark grey Shelby GT350 mustang.