after my best friend's death

after my best friend's death-8

I kept glancing back at the empty seat next to me in English. I was so used to seeing Aaron occupy it now it felt empty without him there. It was Thursday. No one had heard from Aaron these past three days either. I was meant to call him at his place again but I chickened out each time I dialled the number. The possibility of Aaron picking up the phone terrified me. I kept imagining the way I’d tell Aaron about Kieran and me, but I never got to put the words I had mastered now in action.

            Renée poked me from behind. “Have you heard from Aaron?” she whispered leaning forward towards me. It was crazy how close I had gotten to the girls. They even mirrored my thoughts. I shook my head slightly in response. Even my slight movement caught Miss Crouton’s eye and she gave us a sharp look. Renée immediately sprung back to an upright position. As Miss Crouton continued to explain Hamlet’s character to us, I couldn’t help but wonder where Aaron had disappeared to.

            The sharp bell brought me back from my dream world. Lately I was paying frequent visits to my dream world, thoughts about Aaron and Cynthia shadowing me like a dark cloud. Kieran was the silver lining to the cloud. I collected my books and followed Cam. “Lauren, a moment please.” Miss Crouton called out just as I reached the door. I mentally groaned as I motioned for Cam and Renée to carry on without me.

            “Lauren is everything all right?” she asked with concern. Her new avatar startled me. I was used to the strict, no-bullshit Pearl Crouton; this woman was actually the sweet, caring types. Who was this woman and what had she done to the real Miss Crouton? I cleverly masked my internal accusations and half smiled at my teacher. “I see you are self-occupied now-a-days. I never see you paying attention. I mean you were making such progress with your new friends, you seemed alright. But now you seem in a daze, I’ve spoken with some of your other teachers as well. They seem to have the same thing to say about you. If you want a few days off, I can arrange that. We can have your assignments delivered to you.”

            She looked at me curiously. I processed her words. I didn’t realise that my day dreaming sessions were going noticed. “Ma’am I’m fine. Really, it’s nothing to worry about.” I gave her a genuine look, hoping she’d buy it. She seemed to succumb. “If you’re sure…” her voice trailed. I nodded firmly and thanked her leaving quickly after; I did not want any awkward silence to creep in.

            Cam and Renée were waiting outside the class for me. “What was that about?” Renée asked as we first headed to Cam’s locker. “Apparently my day dreaming is going noticed. The teachers are complaining. Just keep waking me up from time to time okay.” I smiled lightly. “You got it,” Cam laughed.

            “Hello ladies” Nate came from behind Renée. “Natie,” I squealed. He winced. It wasn’t that I was excited to see him; I just love to annoy him. “Why do you always call me that?” he gave me hateful glares. I just shrugged non chalantly and headed to our next stop- Renée’s locker. “So what you’ll got next?” he asked tagging along beside us. “I have art, these two have Calculus.” Cam answered. “I think Haylie has biology.” I winked at him. “I never asked what Haylie had,” Nate stated defensively. We just nodded.

            After Sunday, Nate and Haylie had been distant. They weren’t as couple-ly as the rest of us. Haylie said that Sunday night Nate had come over and said that he wasn’t really ready for a relationship yet. He said that had been through a brutal break up recently (facts were confirmed). Haylie was upset at first but she got over it quickly. She said she didn’t like him so much either, he was a little boring and distant according to her. I have to object though, Natie is sweet, caring and totally fun.

            The problem was I kept forgetting the situation between them and continued teasing them with each other. Cam was talking with Nate when Renée poked me. I glared at her hatefully. “Hey don’t give me that look. You asked us to wake you from time to time.” She smiled happily. I groaned loudly. I had no idea what I had brought myself into. Of course they would keep poking me all day for fun. “How about you poke me only when we are in class?”