So Much I Can Take (BWWM)

Chapter 1

Jordan's P.O.V

I pulled the sleeves of my sweater a bit closer to my chest as I adjusted my position in my chair. A small sigh escaped my lips as I continued to hear Jason's harsh words.

I glanced over as he paced across the room; words constantly slipping out of his mouth out of anger and frustration.

"Jason please." I begged once more hoping for a bit of  peace and quiet.

I grabbed my book off the living room table and began to turn the pages until I reached the chapter I desired.

I immediately scanned the pages searching for where I had left off when suddenly a loud noise from the kitchen caused me to drop my book and turn my head towards the direction of the kitchen.

Dark brown eyes instantly met mine and I slowly stood up from the couch.

"Jason!" I placed my book on the table and quickly walked over to our kitchen staring at the shattered pieces of glass all across our floor.

"J-Jason. You can't do this!" I say before placing my hand on my chest hoping to regain some control over my breathing.

A sigh escapes my lips as my eyes slowly shift over to his bloody hand.

My instinct is to immediately walk over and take care of his injury but he quickly places his other hand up indicating me to not even bother.

"Jas-" I begin to walk towards him.

"No Jordan. This is my problem." He replies as he begins to walk away.

"Jason, this is not how we solve our problems!"

I don't hear a response from him as he pulls out our first aid kit.

"Jason, the first aid kit won't help. Let me-"

"Jordan, I said-

"No. This is not how a relationship works. This is not what we agreed on! We need to talk to each other. We need to fix this issue now."

"I don't want to talk about anything." He snapped

I place my hand on my forehead and stared in disbelief at the man I fell in love with.

"Then why are you so worked up? You come home from work and spend the whole afternoon ignoring me and then when I ask what's wrong you push me away and expect me to just pretend everything's okay? Are you serious?"

Suddenly I am met with the dark paired eyes I once fell for but instead of admiration, care and love; I am met with anger.

"Look me in my eyes and tell me you're not cheating on me." He says

His voice filled with so much tension as if he knew something that I didn't.

"W-What?"

Cheating? Where is he getting this from?

I stare back into his piercing eyes and cleared my throat.

"ANSWER MY QUESTION " He yells

His other fist suddenly hits the table causing me to move further away.

"S-Stop! Stop hitting things! I've never cheated on you!"

"You're such a f-"

"Where are you getting this from? I go to work and come home Jason! I barley have time for myself and you think I'm cheating on you! "

"Oh don't give me that Jordan! I see the way the men look at you when you go to work!"

"Men? Jason those are my co-workers who are all married and have kids! They could care less about- "

His eyes suddenly scanned mine before turning away and running his uninjured hand through his hair. I watched as his chest quickly moved up and down from his boiling anger and shook my head.

I allowed a small laugh to leave my lips as I watched him.

"You honestly don't know who I am, do you? You always accuse me of cheating or lying but how do I know you're not cheating on me? " I asked

"Y-You know I would never do that to you." He finally replied as he turned and faced me.

The sudden change of his voice immediately startled me as I pushed back the tears that were so eager to leave my eyes.

"I-I can't believe after what we've been through Jason, you're going back to your old ways. What happened to changing for the better, huh? Countless hours in therapy just to come back to-

"Baby. I-I know and I'm sorry."He slowly took a deep breath before continuing. "I'm just afraid of losing you."

"Losing me? Jason I told you countless times that we're in this together but you can't keep treating me like this."

I watched him carefully as he ran his hands through his hair before tugging at the ends.

"I know that baby. I just-"

"I think it would be best if I slept in the guest room tonight."

"Jordan I really don't think that's necessary. We can-"

"Jason please. I don't want to argue anymore."

I watched him as he stared back into my eyes before clearing his throat and slowly nodding his head.

Without another word I grabbed the broom and began to clean the pieces of glass off the floor.

"I love you, okay?" He said

I stared at him for a split second and repeated the same exact words wondering if he meant his.

A/N: i'm feeling so many emotions right now bc I never wrote anything like this before but please bare with me throughout this book

-Sophie