Harry
I open my eyes and the first thing I feel is pain . Not a tiny stitch in the heart. No. An all extensive pain . Like someone punched a hole in me and pokes around in it. I feel completely hollow. I haven't talked to Louis or one of the other boys until today. I refused to take any call from anyone. And by the amount of calls I got the last days from the boys , my mum , my sister and even Louis , I knew they know about the break up. Louis must have told them.
Louis. The thought of him hits me hard. And I take a couple of deep breaths to stop myself from shaking. He's gone. He left me . For someone else. For a girl. Because i weren't good enough. I bite my lip to stop myself from crying because today is the first day of tour and this means a huge press conference with all the questions about our hopes and expectations about the tour. But how should I focus on anything if Louis will be in the same room with me . It's not like I didn't try to find a way out of this situation . But I figured that faking my own death or play sick won't work.
I open my closet to pull out a plain white shirt and a black skinny jeans. I'm not in the mood to take a lot of effort in my outfit . But that one shirt caught my eye. It is red and white and I know it belongs to Louis . I hesitate but after two seconds I grab it with shaky hands. As soon as the familiar smell reaches my nose I regret that I even took it out. I'm overwhelmed from the inexorably pain which rushes through me . I'm throwing the shirt away as if it's something highly toxic. I rush out of the flat as fast a possible . While I'm driving to the press conference I brace myself to meet the person who broke me and for the pity I'll get from the boys.
As I manage my car into the parking lot I feel myself shaking up again . "Come on Harry! Get yourself together " I whisper to myself and with a last deep breath I get out of the car just to enter the building seconds later.
" Hey Harry . GUYS ! He's here!" I face Liam . He looks at me with so much pity in his eyes . It makes me sick and I feel my stomach troubling. Just seconds later Zayn , Niall and of course Louis are appearing in my sight. " Good to see you man. We actually thought you're dead or something" Zayn says with his calming voice. If he only knew how right he is with his statement. I am dead. Not dead like dead but emotionally I feel dead . Even worse than that. But I manage to fake a small smile for him . Niall hugs me and I can tell from the intensity he hugs me with that he is worried. " Hi Nialler" I whisper trying to swallow the big clump in my throat as I let go of him . And then I hear his voice. The voice which always made me feel good , made me happy and I love to death. " Hey Haz-- Harry " he barely says not even looking at me . I freeze as soon as I hear him choking on my name . The name he gave me . It's his. I'm his. I'll always be his. I'm screaming and crying and breaking down on the inside but I'll decide to play it cool and swallow the tears before they start falling. I just can't take any more pity . "Old habits huh ? " I say coldly . "Alright guys. Time to answer some questions we answered a hundred times until now . Let's go " Liam says starting to shove me into the room .