Friends with benefits???

Why'd i let her go?

POV OF MATTEO:

I stopped kissing Christine. I saw Jada, kissing Rizvan. Rizvan? Why him? Hes weird and he sells drugs and hes always getting suspended for doing something. Why would she want to get caught up with someone like him? Its not safe, hes not safe. I hate that they're kissing.

I take a step forward in their direction. I was gonna stop her from making a bad decision, cuz I still care about her, but Christine holds my arm. I look back her. "If you go over there, we're over." I snatched my arm away from her. I didn't care about Christine. I loved Jada. I was such an idiot to let her go. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have hurt her."

Everyone just stopped and was staring at them kissing. I was the only one moving, and I was moving in their direction. Just a few more steps and I could possibly get the girl I love back.

I reached them and tapped Rizvan on the shoulder. He stopped kissing Jada and turned around to face me. He's a lot bigger when your standing in front of him. "Oh, Matteo wasup?" I wanted to turn around and walk away. It was embarrassing, and everyone was staring. But I couldn't. She was looking at me like she was lost, like she wanted help, like she wanted to run into my arms and never let go. I couldn't just leave her there all alone.

"That's my girl your kissing." Rizvan looked at me like I had said something in another language. "I'm sorry to hear that but your girl kissed me, so I don't think she's your girl anymore." I knew what I had to do to win her back. I balled up my fist and threw a punch.

I never got into a fist fight before so you would think that I failed, but he was bleeding. He was bleeding from his nose and mouth. Even though he was bleeding it didn't seem to phase him. He stumbled back onto Jada. She looked pissed, like she was actually upset, but why? All I felt was five fingers swipe across my face. The pain didn't hit me until three seconds after. I was looking at the ground. Its was her. It was Jada. She was actually mad at me.

"Can I just move on?" I turned to look at her. Rizvan had his arm around her with a smirk on his face and Jada's eye's were full of water. Did she not love me anymore? Did that boat really sail away? No. I pushed it away. It's my fault. I"ve never felt so ashamed, so embarrassed, in my life.

Later that day (after school):

Just one step at a time. I'll be home before I know it, then I can let it all out. I can cry myself to sleep tonight on the bathroom floor in the hand made pool of blood.

She wasn't on the bus this afternoon, but when I looked out the window I saw her Rizvan, Lidia, Exaviar, Aaliyah, and Jakob walking. Probably to town center. She seemed happy. I'm glad she's happy now. It's my turn to make myself happy with razors and pills.

I had to walk past her house to get to mine. That's when the tear hit my cheek. I never thought the day would come when I would cry over a girl that I loved. I walked over to the house and rang the door bell, but I grew the sudden nerve to run home. It wasn't because I didn't want to see Jada or her mom but something else. Last time I denied my feelings I lost someone very dear to my heart.

So I ran, like I was being chased by a pack of wild dogs. I opened the door to my house. Everything seemed fine. I threw my bag to the side and sat on the couch. I turned on the TV and started flipping through the channels. The News caught my attention. There was a plane crash. The plane was coming from Argentina to Florida. There it was again. That weird pain. I picked up my phone and my mom and my step-dad were calling me like crazy. I scrolled down to see a message. It was from my dad. He was coming to visit me. I looked back up the TV. They started listing the names of the people who died. I saw my father's name, but i denied it. Then my phone started ringing. It was Jada. I picked up.

"Sorry to hear about your dad." The phone fell out my hand and dropped to the floor. How could this happen? How could I loose everyone I truly care about so fast.