Be Nice To Me

Please don't

Dear diary,
today Louis was sick.
He texted me saying he couldn't make it to class.
Louis say he felt awful, and I felt awful for Louis.

Today in class,
the bullies were mean to me. I haven't been wearing extra layers since Louis had asked me out. I felt safe. If I felt safe, I was safe. Right?

No, I was wrong. I was so very wrong. I should have known. Without Lou, I am not safe. Without Lou, I will get hurt.
Today diary, Zayn grabbed my flower crown and flushed it down one of the toilet's, but that wasn't all.

Not today.

He then grabbed my curls and threw me against the bathroom stalls. My sides are now purple, they hurt when I lay down. Zayn gripped my shirt in his hands and...it was just inhuman and sick. To see him smirk at how much pain I was in. It was like my pain brought him pleasure.

I had whimpered and asked him to stop. But he didn't. He merely lifted me from the floor and slammed me against the wall, the back of my head hitting the wall violently.

'You're such a faggot. Thinking you can fucking wear your gay ass flower crowns and waltz right in and steal Louis from me? I don't think so.'

Honestly, that made no sense to me. What did he mean by steal? They were only friends. I would never. Never would I steal someone's friend.

I guess I hadn't answered quickly enough and Zayn slammed me against the wall again.

'If you don't start talking back to me, your mouth won't be filled with just words. So speak up, faggot.'

He growled.
I was scared. And I wanted Louis. I needed Louis. I wanted Louis. I wish I was with Louis, then I wouldn't be hurting.

Louis was feeling sick today, and now so was I.

'Please don't.'
I cried hoarsely, my throat ached from crying.
But I guess that wasn't the answer Zayn wanted because his fist connected with my stomach roughly.

'You don't get it, do you?'
He whispered in my ear. It wasn't a soft whisper. Like Louis' soft whisper over the phone. Or when we cuddled and he'd murmur sweet things in my ear.
This whisper, this whisper made me frightened.

'You fucked me over when you started shaking your ass for Louis. Louis was suppose to be mine, I had him in the palm of my hand...and then you show up and suddenly all its ever about it Harry, Harry, Harry.'

Zayn seethed, I could feel his jaw clench as he fists hold on my tightened.

'Please...don't'
I repeated.
I had whispered my words, I didn't have the energy to speak anything else or anymore at all. Everything was moving slow. Everything hurt. I wished it would stop. I wished everything would stop.

Zayn didn't hear my words, or maybe he chose to ignore my words because he just shook his head.

'Maybe I should just fuck you liked you fucked me over. Let you know how it feels to be so weak and destroyed.'

I couldn't even shake my head for a reply. I was scared. I was hurting. What Zayn didn't know was that I felt weak, and I felt completely destroyed every moment of my life. Except for when I was with Louis...
Suddenly I heard the door open and a teacher walked in.

'Zayn Malik! Harold Styles! Skipping class first period?'

It was Mr.Thompson, our maths teacher.
By now, Zayn had let me out of his grip and a cigarette was in his fingers. He must have had one in his pocket. He was extremely quick but, cigarettes and smoking none the less were icky.
Disgusting habit it is.

'Sorry, Thompson. We was or...I mean we were just grabbing a smoke before class. Not a problem, ain't no skipping here.'

Mr.Thompson's eyes stayed on me a little longer than they did on Zayn. He must have maybe noticed how I was just struggling to stand.

'It's a bad habit boys. Now I expect you to be on your way to class now...immediately.'

Grabbing the unlit cigarette from Zayn's hand, Mr.Thompson threw it into a toilet's water. Leaving it to float. Then he left.

Zayn followed him, but now before giving me one last shove into the stall. From there, I cried. I sobbed. Everything hurt. Everything was painful. My chest ached when I breathed and I couldn't stand without feeling the need to cry.

I wanted to text Louis.
To tell him what happened. To have him pick me up in his arms and we could go to his house. We could stay in his room. Cuddled under the blankets forever. Away from everything.

But it would upset Louis. I couldn't tell Louis. He was already sick and this would make him feel worst. I couldn't tell Louis.

So I had decided in texting my best mate, or my only mate, Niall. He left class and found me in the stalls and gave me a ride home. He wanted to stay with me but I made him get back to school. Niall was a smart kid, he would surely be accepted into a great college.He had a bright future ahead of him.

And I...did not have a future.

Diary, tomorrow I see Louis. He'll make everything better. Louis always does.

-Harold