When my life turned for the worst.
This is when my life turned. Both my parents abandoned me, and here I am, 16 and living on my own. Probably for the rest of my life. I have no one, I don't know any if my family any more. Not even my brother will help me out.
I wake up every morning at six am sharp. I get up and start my daily routine of no breakfast, throwing some eyeliner on for no one, not even myself, and running to school. Literally, I run everyday, everywhere. I've elected running as my new life. When I run, I listen to music to keep myself entertained and kept at peace.
I hardly ever go to school, if I do I'm not there for long, maybe an hour or so. I have no need to go, no one wants me there so why should I go? One day, I decided to go for the whole day. And just to clear some things up, I'm no druggie or a trouble maker. I stick to myself, no need to talk to people. When I was at school, this girl came up and complimented me on my eyes and she asked me if I could teach her how to do her eyeliner like mine. And I guess that's kinda how our friendship got started. It was weird at first, to have someone who actually cared about you. When she came over, I was surprised she wasn't even disgusted about my house. It's so unorganized, I thought for sure she would run away. But no, she confidently strode into my messy house. After I showed her how, we talked for a little bit.
And I thought, letting my dark side come out, I don't even know her name. So why did I let her in??? What's wrong with me??
"What is your name?" I ask her, getting impatient by the second.
"Isabel, what's yours?" She hesitated.
"Mine is Liz" I reply, calming down a bit. She seems too preppy, I thought.
"Wanna go for a run???" I excitedly asked her. "I don't really run..." She said, but I didn't left her finish until I pulled her outside and started running. "C'mon, it'll be fun! I do this every day, of every week." I explained to her as I stopped so she could catch up. Isabel, I had to admit, was skinny but way out of shape.
For my 6'2 height, I was pretty stocky, but it helped I carried a 6 pack of abs. Everyone was jealous of those in the locker room. I just sighed and said, "start running." I got some pretty shocked faces. I guess I didn't "look" like a runner. Tall stocky, blonde, blue eyed girl... They all thought I was a "goody two shoes" but they all thought very very wrong.
They didn't appreciate what my life revolved around. Music and running was my life. No matter what, I would always go run 5 miles, everyday. It's how I distracted myself. After my aunt died when I was 12, my only care giver, my brother ran away. I've never seen nor heard of him. My parents abandoned me and my brother when I was 6. Therefore, my aunt, she took us in and gave us a roof over our heads and food to keep us alive.
Today:
"Liz, do you plan to go to college?"
My best friend, my sister actually, asked me nervously.
"I don't know, Bel. Sounds pretty scary." She sighed and wrapped her arms around me. "Love you, Liz." She told me confidently, with a huge grin on her face. Smirking, knowing her plan, I said I love you back. "Hey, let's go somewhere fun. Where there's boys, we need to get you noticed!"
Yeah, not what I was thinking. "Uhhhh-" she cut me off. "C'mon Liz, don't be a party pooper, it's your 18th birthday!"
I gave in. She had a point. "Fine!"
After Bel dressed me up in a sun dress and pretty much professionally did my makeup, I had admit, I looked pretty good.
"Let's go!" Isabel yelled excitedly. We chose to drive down to the beach, which only took us 30 minutes.. When we get there it was 110 degrees outside, so we decided to show some skin and go swimming in the cool river. Wow, there are some nice looking guys here, I thought as Isabel and I, "boycott" down the bech.
In our "language", boycott means to look/search for hot guys. Honestly, I don't remember when or why we came up with that. As we run and jump in the water, I notice we got some guys' attention. I smirk and hop out, feeling frisky, to go converse. "C'mon Bel!" I say, very excitedly. "Wow! I've never seen you so happy!" "Doesn't happen much" I reply sadly. As we walk over there, I notice 3 really nice looking guys. 2 without shirts. Wow, I thought, toned abs. "Sup, girl" one of them looks at me and says. I thought, don't blush, don't blush. But I do anyways. "Hi" I shyly say. "What's your guys' names?" I ask, gaining more confidence by the second. "Nich, Kevin, and Michael, but he likes to be called Mikey" Nich explained. "Oh okay, I'm Liz and this is Isabel, but I call her Bel." He's getting cuter by the second, the way he looks at me gives me butterflies. I've never felt like this before. Wow, I thought, as I caught myself staring at him for about the zillionth time. Nich perked up, and said a little too loud, "who wants to go swimming??" We all jumped up and yelled "mee!". Mikey was pretty cute too, but I wast about to go for him. I saw the look in Bel's eye, the omigosh he's soooo cute look. As we all run into the water, (I was the first one in) Nich made a comment about my abs. "Holy shit, I've never seen a chick with toned abs!" I laughed loudly. "Seriously?! Hah that's running for ya." I looked over and noticed Bel was quietly talking with Mikey, obviously unaware that she was blushing like a tomato. He didn't seem to care though. It was actually kind of cute. As if noticing on cue, Nich pulled me away to ask me a question. "Sooo tell me if its too soon to ask this... But do you have a phone?" I smiled and laughed lightly, "I do, do you?" Of course he had one... I was making a fool out of myself. I think he noticed my thought and said, "Yup, I have one. Wanna exchange numbers?" After we did that, we looked around and found Mikey and Isabel nowhere in sight... "Hmph" I wasn't afraid to make my annoyance clear, I didn't expect Bel to leave me alone with this dude. Hell, anything could happen!
I scornfully looked at Nich for a moment, only to find him mesmerized by the other side of the river. "What's over there?" I ask, mysel being mesmerized as well. "Actually, I'm not quite sure. Lets go check it out?" I'm not sure if it was a question, or a positive lets go over there. But I started swimming over the currents anyways. "Liz! Wait for me! My everyone can swim as fast as you!" I had to stop because I laughed so hard. I knew what he ment by that. I knew that he didn't want to admit I had a stronger core than he did. "Don't laugh at me!" He scowled, but I saw the slightest smirk and started laughing again. Here we were, in the middle of the river, acting as if we knew each other forever. "C'mon" I say excitedly, knowing full well that he'd follow me anyways. As we got to the other side, I started climbing up shore. Did I hear voices?
Am I going crazy??
"Sht" I said harshly.
"Wha-" "stop talking for a sec!" I cut him off. I followed the voices until they came clearly into view. It was Bel and Mikey! God dammit! They scared me!
"What the heck are you guys doing here??" Nich objected before I could say anything. "We wanted to get to know each other." Mikey easily said, while Bel nodded, agreeing with his words. "Talk about betrayal" I scoffed loudly and walked away. So I admit it, I was a jealous friend. But really, she could have gave me a sign.
Nich ran after my and practically hugged me. "You okay?" He asked, looking at me with sincere eyes. "Yeah, I think I'm good." An idea pops in my head. "Do you guys wanna hang out today??" "Omg yes!" He says, a little too excited but it's okay, I'm starting to like him a little. But I think it's too soon. So I keep it to myself and start humming lightly to myself.
I tear my heart open, I see myself shut.
My weakness is that I care too much.
And my scars remind me, that the past is real.
I tear my heart open, just to feel.
That was my favorite song, I'm actually not too find of Papa Roach. But I am in love with "Scars".
