It started at 16, the first time I met her. I could have anyone, but my heart only raced for her. She was the kind of girl of girl who always sat at the back of the room, always quiet, and talked to no one. Even if she wasn't pretty to others and only average, in my eyes she was perfect. I couldn't help, but fall for her.
Each day I would try to talk to her, to crack a beautiful smile, to hear a cute laughter, but nothing. I felt hopless, I felt like I was falling in an endless pit. Loving someone who seemed like they hated you, never the less I still loved her.
One day I finally thought of forgetting about her until she stopped me in the hallways. She put her finger over her mouth and looked out and waited til everybody left to talk.
"Do you think this is fun?"
I was confused and lost on what she meant.
"Playing around with me, trying to be my friend when everybody dodges me like a virus. I try and try to ignore my feelings for you, but you keep bringing them back."
"That's not what it's like. You are the only one that makes me feel like this." I grabbed her hand and placed it on my chest where my heart was thumping in a fast pace.
"But why me? Why is it me."
"My heart just fell inlove and you can't really understand it, you just accept it."
She bowed her head down, but I brought her head up to meet eyes.
"What's wrong, do you not have the same feelings?"
"N-no, I'm afraid of what others would think of a you dating a nobody.."
"Nobody is going to care, we have each other."
I dip down my neck and slowly pressed my lip on hers. I wanted her to trust me and forget about everyone else. It was going to be fine.
But it wasn't.
I had caught her getting bullied and the reason was me, but she'd never admit it. She always kept the bulliying to herself, even when I've seen it with my own eyes. She just gives me a smile like nothing happened and tells me to not worry about it, but how can't I. How can I just stand here and watch the one I love get hurt because of me.
Without her knowing I would find the bullies and show them not to mess with her, but things only gotten worse. She would only get insults thrown at her and how she can't protect her own self. She would only ignore them and give me a smile, but I know she's only pretending. Her eyes full of sadness covering a hurt face with a fake smile.
She tries to stay strong, but I know she's already shattered. I try to pick the pieces back up and take a step forward to help, but she only takes a step back and break one at a time.
I guess she finally broke enough and decided to stop this. She tld me meet her at the top of the roof top to talk to her. The roof top was the place I showed her, to get away from everyone. I raced to the roof top and saw her standing, looking at the sky.
"I'm tired of this."
"Tired of what?" I hesitantly I walked towards her.
"Stop pretending, you know what I'm tired of. The hate, you told me it's going to be fine. That nobody was going to care, but what is this?"
"We can get through this."
"I'm tired don't you get it! I feel so broken..." She looked at me with tears running down her face, "I love you so much, but I don't want to do this."
I slowly took a step forward, but as if she was mimiciking she slowly took a step backwards. I quickly ran to her, but it was too late. My fingers glided over her's and for the first time I saw her smile, not a fake one, not a sad one, a real one. And like a rag doll she laid lifeless on the floor and all that was heard was screams of those below.
I was now standing next to her casket, I could feel tears slipping out of my eyes as I gave my speech,
"There's a rhyme about sticks and stones and how they could break bones, but words never hurting. She was broken both with words and stone, both shattering her. She never asked for it though, she never wanted to feel hurt, just love."
