Would They Care If I Was Gone? A Jahvie fanfic ((BoyxBoy))

Chp. 7: Don't phunk-phunk-phunk with my heart!

Dahvie's POV:

I run out of the room, through the living room and out of the door. I can't let him find out. I won't give him even more reasons to hate me. It's my fault he also gets beat up by Luke and his team. I am not good enough for him. I won't let him find out exactly how worthless I see myself. How pathetic I really am.

I run around the block and home. Hopefully my mom won't beat me up, if I'm lucky she'll just ignore me. I open the door and walk into a way too quiet house. My mom's annoying voice isn't sounding. My dad's judging and hating talk and dry laugh is silenced too. I shrug and run up the stairs quickly. When I walk into my room I find out why the house is so quiet. My room is emptied for stuff, all my posters, some of my CDs and almost all my furniture is missing. On the floor is a folded paper. I stand paralyzed as I look at my room. What. The. Hell. When it all has sunk in I slowly walk over to the letter on the floor. I don't know why, but I'm scared of what it might hold. I look out of the window and even the birds seem to be silently waiting for me to reveal what the letter says.

I take a deep breath and walk the way over to the spot on the floor where the letter lies. The floor squeaks and I chuckle to myself. My old house's creepy sounds don’t exactly make the mood of the situation less creepy. I open the letter and read it through.

Jayy's POV:

I stand in my room and stare into the air. I’m so confused. What did I do wrong? Did I go too far? I’m sure he isn’t even gay. Even if he is, I’m sure I’m just too weird. I turn around and go back to my bed. As I’m up in the bed I fall forward with my head down in the pillow. I lay there and feel the tears starting to come up in my eyes, immediately leaving wet spots on my pillow. I scream into the pillow trying to get some of the frustration out. I scream and scream until I hear the door to my bedroom open silently. I stop screaming and bite my lip.

The tears start flowing again and soon my head is laying on a pillow all soaked in tears of confusion and sadness. He’s too good for me anyways. My dad was right. I’m too worthless for anybody to ever love me. I feel the mattress bowing a bit down under the weight of whoever just came in. I sob a bit and a hand caresses my shoulder gently. “What’s wrong hun? Where did Dahvie go?” I pull my head out of my pillow and sit up in front of my sister. She tilts her head slightly to the side with a curious yet sad look in her eyes. She always knows when something is wrong and when to and when not to say anything. I guess, with my makeup smeared in my face, and looking like a raccoon, it isn’t weird that she knows something went wrong. But she knows that I’d like to tell her, but I just can’t right now. She moves closer and sits beside me. I lean up against her and end up lying on my back on the bed with my head lying in her lap. She brushes my hair with her hand and starts humming a lullaby our mom used to sing to us in the nights when we couldn’t sleep.

When I’m starting to control my sobs she silently asks again “What happened between you and Dahvie?” with a relaxing voice. I think back and wonder the exact same question. “I don’t know…” I close my eyes and go back an hour in time in my head. “He saw my cuts and started kissing them in a way that said it would all be alright.”  I say in a silent and distant voice as I see what happened all over in my head. “He kissed up my wrists and made sure to kiss every cut and scar. When he was done with the wrists he asked to see the other scars. I trusted him, so I showed him my hips and after that my thighs. He kissed every one of my scars” I hear a chuckle and blink back to the room and Stephanie. I look at her with a questioning look.

"It’s so romantic…!” She says. Romantic? I still don’t understand what’s going on in her head after living with her for 16 years. I shake my head. Girls… And go back to telling what happened. “He hugged me, but pulled away far too fast. We talked and he started crying because I asked him if he hated me for being a freak… He… He said he didn’t hate me as tears spilled out of his eyes. I cupped his cheeks in my hands and wiped away the tears. We moved forward and he blushed, goddamnit that blush made my heart pound faster. I kissed him. I kissed Dahv. It turned into a makeout session and he found out that… Okay you don’t wanna hear that part. Let’s say… he found a… moan trigger” I chuckle at what I’m sitting here and talking to my sister about. She chuckle and wink at me. “Yeah Jayy we heard that. Hmm… It was the hair right?” She says and laughs sweetly. “How did you know that?” I ask curiously “You remember that time when I accidently caught you fapping? Yeah… All I saw was you tugging your hair with one hand and the other hidden under the table” Stephanie laughs as I feel my head turning red from embarrassment.