everybody changes
Chapter 1
Starting with the end;
I slumped into my normal position on my bed. Day 6 of this and nothing is getting any better but worse. There is a lump inside my throat that won’t go, a pain inside my chest that feels like its tightening every second, a sting in my eyes from every tear that has escaped them, a migraine from the memories i keep forcing myself to re-live and wishing i could get them back. I bit into another slab of chocolate, probably my fourth bar today. I’m here, existing, breathing. But when he left a part…no.. most of me went with him. I don’t want to forget or push this away, I want all of him, now, tomorrow, next year, whenever. I want him back. I want Brad here.
1 year earlier;
‘Please just come with us? It won’t be awkward, I promise.’ Scarlett said with a massive grin, tugging at my shirt.
‘Ugh. I don’t know who he is, and he might be a bit up himself, you know Scar?’ I said, huffing and plonking myself on my bed.
One thing you should know about me is that I’m very much used to disappointment. I keep myself to myself, apart from having a few close friends, I spend most of my time on the internet, procrastinating. I don’t like being around new people, or people in general. I sound like a right slob and a bore but that is just the way it is.
‘Ugh, you know what? sometimes Beth you can be a real pain in the arse!’ Scarlet said, brushing her hair behind her ear and crossing her arms in frustration, her eyes narrowing in my direction.
‘Well i’m sorry! You’re all loved up and you want me to be too! Look Scar, i’m not that type of person! You know that!’ I said, almost furiously until i realized a tear had brushed down my cheek and had fallen onto my joggers, leaving a dark mark.
‘Aw, don’t.’ She said, sitting beside me and wiping my tear away.
I have a lot of trust issues. Ugh, I despise having to go into detail about this but my ex well he was, do you know what? It doesn’t matter but ever since that i hid away and shut myself out from everything and everyone. This is why i am who i am and when people try to change it, it doesn’t do anything but frustrate me. I’m happier, well I’m better now than i ever was, just me, myself and wifi.
‘Please. You might like him. I thought the same as you at first, Beth, but seriously, he’s a real nice guy and he’s talkative. I shouldn’t say this because he’s like my little brother but he’s so attractive…’ Scar said, letting out a small laugh whilst brushing her hair out of her face and into a neat bun.
Scar was really beautiful. She had pale blue eyes and dark brown hair which swept into her face constantly but it compromised her freckles and petite face shape. She’s been with this guy, Tris, for over 6 months and eh, she’s happy. He’s a nice guy and he’s in a band, bit of a party go-er and flirt. She really does love him, though, and i’ve never seen anyone look at her the way he does. Scar was 2 years my senior, she was 18 going on 19. I was 16 and still lived with my parents in the small town of Bath.
I sighed. ‘You’re not going to shut up about it, are you?’ I said, moving my head up from looking at my lap and at her, frowning.
‘Nope.’ She said, grinning and pulling me up. ‘Now, fix your hair, do your makeup and put on something pretty. You look a right scruff bag.’
I glanced into the tall, vintage like mirror that stood at the corner of my room. She was right. I looked at my reflection. My joggers were slightly rolled up, both different lengths on each leg, my hoody was over sized and drowned me out. My blonde hair was scrunched up into a messy bun at the top of my head and the little effort i had made to put makeup on had smudged a little down my cheeks.
