I'm Not The Sun

A gift

The bell wakes me from my dreamless sleep. My mother used to tell me that people always dream even when you think you don't that night, the difference between that and a normal dream is that you don't remember it. At all. I walk to the edge of my cage and peer out the door. On the side is a small clock that if I twist just enough I can see the time. It's 10 in the morning. Breakfast is in a half hour. I ask to be let out and wander to the bathroom. I wash my face and brush my teeth then head back to my room. I decide to change clothes since I don't like wearing the same clothes for that long. We have a set of allowed clothes, like khaki/jean pants, loose shirts, stringless hoodie things, and sandals. It's pretty limited and I'm honestly suprised I'm even allowed to wear a bra because I'm pretty sure I could strangle someone with it. Or myself with it. Whichever comes first.

I sit down on the makeshift bed and crisscross my legs. I start to fiddle with my pant leg and think how bored I am. So very bored. I decide to strategize. Even thought I'm not always that good at it, I like to plan and pretend to solve some kind of puzzle. When I was younger I always drew patterns and turned everything into a pattern. In elementary school I would bring trivia and 'spot the difference' books with me. That was fun for me. It also passes time. The only downside would be that if I don't find the right answer I get kinda mad. Yeah, I need to work on that... But for now I think of ways I could escape. I come up with five different strategies. Each one more risky than the last. The thought entertains me as I wonder if I could pull it off. If I ever would pull it off. Probably not. Unless I had good reason.

Before I realize how fast the clock ticked away the bell rings. A guard comes and escorts me. It's a different one from last night. I'm starting to recognize their shifts but that's it, I have no clue who to expect to see. The walk to dining hall feels slow and heavy, like my feet are trudging through molasses. When I get there I order my food and assume my usual seat. I'm midway through my meal when I hear loud shuffling and a scream. Several patients cover there ears from the high pitched cry, others simply stare, and a few desperately hide under the table for confinement and safety. I stare, unamused. Two nurses rush over to the girl who screamed. She stares at her plate of half eaten food and is panicking. Her chest falls up and down at a rapid pace like an airplane going through turbulence. Something must've triggered that reaction, what it could be I have no idea. Honestly, anything can make these people tick, from the crawling of an ant to a misplaced step. This kind of thing happens at least once a week and after a while it almost gets annoying. I watch as the nurses console her and take her away to what I can only assume is the so-called healing room. I hurry to finish and rush back to my room. I still have nothing to do but I enjoy sitting in the light darkness.

After a few hours I hear a familiar voice.

"Hellooo," the voice chimes. Mrs. Powet. My ears jump for joy and my eyes stand on tiptoe. After precisely 7 seconds I see her light ginger hair turn around the corner and her eyes meet mine. I feel a small smile attempt to sneak away from my normal bland face.

"Phoenix, how've you been? I brought you something." She smiles. A bright smile, the kind that makes rainbows grow and spring. Her eyes crinkle at the corners.

"Good, I've been good. What about you?" I ask.

"Oh you know," she waves a hand, "this that than more this but overall great."

"That's nice." I don't know what to say. My conversations only usually last for about two minutes before the words decide to hold hands, grow legs, and run off.

"Here, let me show what I got for you." She happily digs through her oversized purse. A half minutes passes by before she pulls out a small container with a delicately tied ribbon on it. I stare at the box with curiosity. Mrs. Powet turns to face the guard and asks him if she can take me for a walk. Reluctantly he nods and asks for us to simply be back in an hour.