Hello guys. So, new story! I'll try my best to be consistent and update weekly. This is kind of different from my usual stuff, I figured I should try to write a college au. I wanted to step it up a notch when it comes to writing, but plot wise it's more light-hearted and not so much drama ( maybe?;) ) .
This is just the prologue, chapter 1 will jump back two weeks to how they met.Please let me know what you think and if you'll read on, since this is a new story I'll see if I continue depending how good it does.
Rate,comment, and maybe follow me? Ly!
____________
and then
your dancesong
soul. rarely-beloved
a single star is uttered,
and i
think
of you
- e.e cummings
Mitch stares at him from across the room. He could definitely be a bit more subtle than this, but he's so concentrated that he ceases to realize there are other people around, and he's staring so blatantly; some of them start throwing him suspicious looks and amused eyes (he doesn't really care anyway) - his mind lays off the rational side of things and lets his eyes wander over the boy sitting on the couch, laughing and listening to a story someone else in the group is telling.
His eyes are so blue Mitch forgets what day it is, so there's no chance he can figure out whatever the other person is rambling about. The kind of blue that knocks his heart so hard all it's layers wind down, diluted into a mess of feelings. The kind of laugh and presence that coats everything around in light - not the strident light of neon, but the light that seeps through leaves and makes dust look like gold in the afternoon.
He listens attentively, every breath and muscle and atom of his directed towards the point of his interest, invested wholeheartedly in whatever the other person is saying. Mitch can see it, read it in the crinkles that form by his eyes as he smiles and nods, encouraging. He doesn't admit on being a tad jealous - wishing he was the center of all that attention.
In everything that Mitch has been observing, that's exactly what he is: undoubtedly, un-ironically enthusiastic, to the point where people roll their eyes at his childish optimism. Mitch, instead, is taken with it, barely can stand looking at it from how bright he finds it to shine, how untainted and rare he deems it. Apparently, the conversation is funny too, because the boy breaks into laughter; that's another thing, his laugh. Mitch knew he had a problem when he first heard him laugh - it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. It blooms from the chest into the loveliest sound, and like everything else he can see through his (probably biased) view, it's honest. His entire body shakes with it, a wave that gently draws away into a smile.
All this, while he's blissfully unaware he's being noticed, instead just interacting with the people moving and talking around him, mirroring with softer colors the reality that pours over him continuously.
Or maybe, just maybe (most likely) he is just an ordinary boy, who happens to have ordinary blue eyes, who smiles in a mundane way and who laughs like everyone else , and ,as usual, he has romanticized this person into something he's not, and smothered him into who he imagines him to be.
Maybe Mitch doesn't have a crush on Scott, but just on the idea of him, and how much easier would that be, honestly. Because if he does genuinely have a crush on him.. then what?
____
He groans and covers his face with his hands, in attempts to hide the embarrassing shade of red he's turned. Leave it to him to make a fool out of himself in front of all his friends. It was just turning so frustrating; to the point where he'd lose sleep over it. He knew he was useless, that no matter how much he'd pressure himself to stop thinking about Scott, to lose interest and distract his mind, he would inevitably come back to it. It gnawed on him how many times he found himself thinking about the blonde since he started counting.
He'd started losing focus at school, that's how ridiculous it was. He'd just stand there, in class, while the professor went on about subjects that would otherwise fascinate Mitch. He was a bit of a nerd, always asked questions and engaged, wrote lengthy papers and did the extra-work. Now, he stared in blank and over-analyzed something the blonde had said, a text he sent and tried to break down the exact thoughts and intentions behind it.
He'd make up scenarios on the way to the coffee-shop in campus , all the cute notes they'd write each other if it were to happen, how they would walk this exact road hand in hand, with obnoxious smiles. Instead it was just an exhausted, severely under-slept Mitch, miserable in his thickest cardigan on his way to get some caffeine (again) in order to sustain himself.
That's why he agreed to come over when Kirstie called him, convincing him with the promise of pizza and video games. He knew Scott would be here, and thus he would get the opportunity to figure out whether his crush was real or not, a fantasy image he could quickly erase and move on. The Universe had other plans apparently, because he was getting to no conclusion - and for the past two hours he'd been silently brooding, staring at the boy like a creep and playing an anoying 'I do- no I don't' game in his head. What's worse, he'd started to notice more things he liked about him (how he laughs at the worst jokes, the cute furrow in his eyebrows when he's concentrated, the flow of his voice as he speaks about something he's interested in) .
At first, Mitch figured it to be a momentarily attraction, a changing interest that would soon go away. Of course the first thing Mitch noticed when they bumped into each other was 'Holy fuck, he is hot', but then he noticed how big Scott smiled when they shook hands. How he looked happier to see him than anyone had in months. Scott started talking and only after a few moments, Mitch could swear he heard his heart whispering 'Oh no'. Like it knew what it had coming, the last warning before a tsunami. Literally, because just as Scott waved them goodbye later that evening
Kirstie noticed how Mitch's eyes lingered on him leaving, and casually mentioned how Scott had mentioned previous girlfriends and was ' straight as far as she knew it' . Mitch rolled his eyes at that, because he thought his friend was being ridiculous. Considering what happened In the next two weeks, events that brought him to the moment he was miserably pining over his straight friend, maybe Kirstie was right.
Maybe, if that night hadn't happened, if they hadn't met in such weird circumstances, this would've remained a harmless attraction; Mitch was attracted by straight guys all the time. But they always went away quickly, since the excitement died down immediately. It never turned into anything, because Mitch never physically stopped in the middle of a hallway because something that person said left them breathless. Because they didn't accidentally reveal themselves to them, didn't become friends. He felt like such a cliche. It wasn't wrong to say it - he was really, really into a straight guy, and that was that.
Mitch was always the kind to get so thrilled from imagining people as miracles, as adventures, as these fine and precious things that presented him to situations which revealed life as exciting and worth living. It didn't take long for him to realize what a toxic thought cycle this could create when it came to romantic feelings. And maybe it happened because his mind was bored, eager to create another fantasy to drive itself crazy over, a mystery to solve, a puzzle to figure out.
Or maybe it was just the consequence of a series of events out of his powers, something that happened naturally and gradually.
YOU ARE READING
-papercut- // (scomiche)
Teen Fiction"Or maybe, just maybe (most likely) he is just an ordinary boy, who happens to have ordinary blue eyes, who smiles in a mundane way and who laughs like everyone else , and ,as usual, he has romanticized this person into something he's not, and smoth...
