A tale of mermans and witchdoctors

And he was right yet again

Because I've been wanting to write a merman AU for a while... In the picture, you can see how Merman!Scott looks (without the glasses because eh, underwater dorky glasses? Where do you even buy them). The photo is out of focus but meep.

I want reviews on the art too.

Or else I'm sending Fritz after you.

"I tell you, that was a mermaid."

Vincent scoffed, and Fritz glared at him before looking back at his client. "Really? That's so cool, man!"

The boy nodded energically. "I heard you can make potions to breath underwater with their hair! Is it true?"

Fritz shrugged. "I've never met a merfolk, so I'm not sure. However, I seriously doubt the hair is what you have to use. I see the oil of their gills as a more probable option. I should have some... Oh, there it is."

He handed to the brunette a little bottle full of silverish liquid.

"Put a bit if it on your nose, around the nostrils. If it doesn't work, put more. Don't try it in the sea, though, I don't want to lose a precious client like you."

As the young man walked out the shop, Vincent snorted.

"It hurts my soul seeing you manipulate those poor idiots into buying your shitty stuff."

Fritz slapped his arm lightly. "Don't say that. Magic is a thing, whether you like it or not."

"Yeah, right. And a mermaid will magically appear on my doorsteps one day."

The ginger smirked. "Who knows it won't happen?"

"I do. Because it won't."

"You said that about Jeremy becoming father too, and yet it's three months he's adopted that cute little boy that is Mike."

Vincent groaned. "You still bring that up?"

"I do. And what about Chelsea?" Fritz made a face. "'Don't be silly, Smith, why would my Chelly-Selly cheat on me?'" he mimicked sarcastically, eyes rolling. "Was that how you called her? Chelly-Selly?"

"You're an asshole."

An hearty laugh exited from the redhead's mouth. "I'm adorable, shut the fuck up. Oh, and for the records. Everybody was more than happy when you ditched her. Really sickening you two were."

Vincent all but growled, only making Fritz let go another amused chuckle.

"Seriously though. What you do is fraud, Fritz."

The smaller boy didn't look at him, as he closed his Witchcrafty, voodoo et similia shop for the night, opting instead for an unimpressed shrug.

"I dunno man. Have you ever seen anyone wanting their money back from me?"

Vincent snorted. "That's probably because you're a part of the mafia and people are scared of fucking with you."

"Bluh. I'm way past my mafia phase and you should know it."

Vincent didn't know what to make of that answer, so remained silent. His best friend was scary, that much was official.

"Still, you're not making me believe mermaids exist. 'Photos or it didn't happen', am I right?"

Fritz shrugged. "Fair enough. I don't have a photo, though..."

"Then I'm not believing you. Period."

"Suit yourself. Oh, and be careful, the Wheater announced a storm tonight."

~~~

"Holy shit!"