Glow | Tokyo Ghoul

# 0 2 8 ⦋ Bittersweet ⦌

— edited 2023

word count — 2833

♫

"Looks like the roller coasters are biting you in the ass," Haru chuckled, taking a large sip from her soft drink. I forced a grin to my face, but it disappeared just as quickly as it came. "Dude, you don't look so hot."

    "You think?" I managed to let out as I began rubbing my face.

    "Come on, the bathroom's inside." It was no other than Jin that offered up his services. Swallowing whatever bitter emotion I had held in, I followed his lead to the lavatory, realizing that my reaction and spiraling was all stress-induced.

    "You good?" he questioned as he fixed his hair.

   After washing my face, I gave him a nod as I gazed upon my own reflection. It was the same look I had on my face when I first found out about Kaneki, having worry consume me; when I tried to get the ORC off of Kaneki's back, and when I had found out that Nishiki and Jin were Ghouls.

    "Honestly," my voice almost broke as I wiped my mouth, turning to Jin on my left. "I couldn't stop thinking about what Sumie said."

   There was a twitch along Jin's features. He turned away to look at the mirror once more. "Is it a turn off?"

    "Not really...not exactly...but it bugged me."

   He sighed. "I don't know what to tell you. You wanna leave?"

   My breath caught in my throat. "Huh?"

    "Do you want to go home? The ride home is a lot shorter, so you won't have to spend an hour on the road." His overprotection of Mirélle was one of the most intimidating parts of him.

    "N-no, I didn't say I wanted to go home."

    "Then you're willing to see her again? And not act all...weird?"

   I think so.  "Yeah. It's still Mirélle, after all."

    "Then why do you have that look on your face?"

   The guilt simmered back into my lungs. "It was just a bit of a shock, y'know. I've grown so close to Miri that what Sumie said blindsided me, and I didn't know how to process it..."

    "So you decided to leave her, then."

   I couldn't find the words to his blame; he was right. But again...

    "Why didn't you stay behind?"

   He chuckled, but it was fake. "Are you kidding me? I thought you were smarter than that, Hide."

   Not about this, apparently. Not when it came to Mirélle and this entirely weird friend group.

   When I didn't answer, he continued. "If Miri woke up and everyone was gone, except me, how do you think she'd feel?"

    "I wanna say 'relieved' but—"

    "The exact opposite, actually. First," he held out his fist, counting down how it would've probably played out. "She'd get mad at me, and think I was cockblocking. Second, when she sees that you've left her, she'd be devastated. She'd deny it because she wouldn't want you to feel bad, of course, but she'd be upset.

    "You say you've gotten so close to her and yet you don't know how she'd react to your disappearance?"

   The sensation in my chest inflated. I grit my teeth and continued to bite the inside of my mouth.