For Michael

I will always love you

Michael, where do I start? We didn't have to end. Age doesn't matter, and like you said, you don't care about the law.

Remember how we met? June 15, 2015. Twitter DMs. You direct messaged me about that fan fiction I wrote. You were the only one who liked it. You were the only one who checked out the other chapters. (even tho that fanfic really sucked) You gave me your skype and everything grew from there.

We made each other better. We always made each other laugh. Remember that night where we laughed so hard we cried? I don't remember just one night you made me laugh that hard--- there are too many to count. Remember all those inside jokes? The "inside" jokes?

Remember that time when we cried? We just cried because there was nothing left to do. We cried for all the broken thoughts, all the forgotten people, all the good times and all the bad times. That night meant a lot for me. I trusted you enough that I could cry in front of you.

Remember when we would write 5SOS and 1D fanfictions? Remember how you would force me to write smut, so you could see how bad it was? We would laugh so hard those days. Those were the best days, us fangirling over our favourite bands and favourite video games. I really miss the time when it was so simple.

Remember when it was all simple? When we had no care in the world?

Remember the nights we would stay up? Listening to music, watching movies, talking about just anything that came about our minds... I miss it. I really do.

Even though we were just friends for a couple months, it felt like forever. You were my best friend until that night.

The night you decided to ask me out.

Don't get me wrong, I had a crush on you since the say we met. You seemed to be perfect.

But you are turning 18 in December.

I'm not old enough for you, and I wanted to spare us the pain of breaking up on your birthday. And to spare us the pain of a long-distance relationship.

Michael, why would you turn things ugly?

There aren't enough words to express what I feel.

You took everything and threw it all away. What we had--- did it mean anything?

Just because I was thinking about us in the long run?

"But Alyssa... It doesn't matter right now. I'm not 18 yet."

But you will be.

"Alyssa, baby, please...."

I'm not your baby.

"If you make this not happen, I don't know if we can be friends anymore."

Well, I don't see the reason why. We both can get over our crushes. We can move on.

The most recent talk we had disturbed me a lot. It made it seem that all you wanted from me is nudes, sex, shizzle like that. Is that all I am to you? Just your soon-to-be sex doll? Is that all I ever was to you? You know what, don't answer that.

I don't want an answer.

And through all of this, I no longer want you. You told me things that I can't forget.

"You know what, Liss? Whats the point of this anymore? There is no point! I don't want to do this anymore. I can't, Aly. I can't do this, I don't want to. Don't call me again."

And Mikey, that made me cry harder than me turning you down.

So I guess the point of this wattpad story is for you to know how I feel. I want you to know that your words broke me. I'm a shattered piece of glass. I am half the person I once was because all you wanted from me was my body. All I want to say to you is I loved you.

I loved the way you made me laugh.

I loved the talks we had together.

I loved how you always found a way to make me smile.

I loved you.

But now, I guess this is a goodbye. Goodbye, Michael. Goodbye to our late night conversations. Goodbye to all the happy tears, goodbye to our friendship, and goodbye to "us".

Goodbye, Mikey.

I'll miss you.