𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵? [ 𝘾𝙞𝙚𝙡 𝙋𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙤𝙢𝙝𝙞𝙫𝙚 ]

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This story is also on Quotev where I'm signed as Solxtice

Song link -> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNbZJ-IgAEg

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"Can you hear the silence?
Can you see the dark?
Can you fix the broken?"

Long (H\C) locks shone in the moonlight as they cascaded down the black clad lady's shoulders. Unshed tears filled her saddened, (E\C) eyes and a lonely dagger rested its fancy handle in trembling, pale hands. In the dim moonlight she waited, only the whispers of the wind and the silence of the forest below to be heard.

"Can you feel... can you feel my heart?"

That night, on the balcony of the ancient mansion that had become her home and sanctuary, she stared at the deadly, poisonous weapon in her hands, aiming it at her sweaty throat, dressed in the funeral's garments. She would soon reach the forgotten voice that hunted her dreams nightly, giving her horrendous nightmares and frightening thoughts. She would end it all. Otherwise she would see them again, clawing at her feet, blaming her, screaming at her for being a traitor. She didn't want to see their bloody faces, their sharp claws tearing her flesh off, their piercing teeth ripping and slashing her skin.

"Can you help the hopeless?
Well, I'm begging on my knees,
Can you save my bastard soul?"

Her mind was spinning, her thoughts were confused. Suddenly her husband's eyes appeared in front of her. Those deep, calming blue eyes that had captivated her the first time she had seen them. She knew they held pain, oh so much pain. But she had welcomed it, she had welcomed him. She had always been intrigued by them. Those unfathomable orbs which claimed to hold no love, no tie to human feelings, no mercy. But she learned it was just a façade, only a conventional defiance to embrace in front of the cruel and the damned. Oh, how she loved those eyes; how she loved the fact that he only let them shine when in the privacy of their quarters, while he showered her with affection and admiration. But soon there would be nothing to be proud of.

"Will you wait for me?"

Now her tears-streaked face held so much pain, so much regret. She wasn't as strong willed as him. She had always esteemed his charming behavior and solid determination. She would surely disappoint him.

All of the nights where they shared their passion, their love. All of the caresses, the kisses the affectionate gestures. All of their walks by the beach, when he would whisper those sweet words in her ear, promising an eternal and blissful future together. All of the witty comments they had shared. All of the arguments on her safety and well-being. His shouts as he screamed how she was the most important person for him, the last shard of hope in his twisted world, the only one to bring him happiness, the only link he had to his humanity. He would let nothing happen to you. He would protect you. Always. Even if it meant to protect you from yourself. And he did.

"I'm sorry brothers,
So sorry lover,
Forgive me father,
I love you mother"

Suddenly two arms enveloped her waist from behind, giving her a sense of warmth and safety. She felt protected. More tears stained her reddened cheeks. Finally, she let the dagger slip from her shaky hands and turned around, embracing her beloved. She sobbed loudly, letting it all out. She had failed. She couldn't even bring herself to think about it. She had failed them. She screamed, louder and louder, until she was on her knees, rotting in despair. She was a coward.

"Can you hear the silence?
Can you see the dark?
Can you fix the broken?"

He followed her in her sorrow. He had almost lost her. His only reason to live. She almost slipped from between his fingers. He embraced her with all his might. He gripped her waist and tried to comfort her with whispers and sighing. He could feel her. He could feel her pain. He understood it. He had felt the same bleakness and despair many years before.

"Can you feel my heart?"

They laid on their bed, hands and legs interweaved. He watched with sorrow her blank and void face. She felt nothing. He couldn't bear seeing her in such a pitiful state. He wanted his smiling young girl back. He wanted the girl who one way or another could make him laugh heartily even when he was in grumpy mood. He wanted the girl who had stolen his heart with her soft voice and comforting presence. He wanted the girl with whom he could share even the calming moments of silence without feeling awkward. He wanted his wife back.

"I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone.
I long for that feeling to not feel at all"

He had been so scared when he saw her with that dagger aimed at her throat. He feared losing her more than he feared losing his life. And so he told her. He told her how he had always taken his distances from the world, how he had always defied his feelings from the night of the fire. He told her how in her company he could be just Ciel and not Ciel Phantomhive, the Queen's Guard Dog. He told her how he felt alive when he was with her. How he hadn't bene anymore lonely when she came into his life.

"The higher I get, the lower I'll sink.
I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim"

And as he pronounced those words, she smiled a watery smile in which she reversed her feelings, her love. She couldn't deny it. She had failed, but he also knew very well what failure felt like. Maybe they could bring themselves to share it and maybe they could continue living in failure together.

"Can you hear the silence?
Can you see the dark?
Can you fix the broken?
Can you feel... can you feel my heart?"