Feelings Collided

Chapter 1

When I told him I liked him, I immediately knew it was a mistake. He had so many questions, that even I couldn't answer. I regretted as soon as I told him. Lately we'd been getting closer and as we grew closer so did my feelings for him. I thought he was beginning to like me as well. More flirtatious texts and getting more friendly at school. Dunstan wasn't like the other guys I had crushes on before. He wasn't popular or drop dead gorgeous but I still had strong feelings for him. I don't know what it was about him, but I dreamed about us kissing in the moonlight and him putting his reassuring arms around me. Sadly that never happened though.

After the day I told him I liked him, things were never quite the same. We didn't talk at school, we stopped texting and we grew apart. But he was the typical guy, if he saw a picture that I looked pretty in, then only would he send me a message. I started to understand that we wasn't the guy for me and that somewhere out Mr Right was waiting for me. I tried so hard to get over him but It never seemed to work. I didn't know why I liked this too tall, too awkward guy. So on I went on the road to getting over Dunstan.

Before I began liking him, I liked this other guy, Mason, that I'd known since I was 5. We used to go on holiday together and we were close to each other but something happened. We used to see him and his family almost every weekend but then I didn't see him for 5 years, and wow in those 5 years, I have to say that puberty hit him like a truck. When I saw him again, he was no longer this short, awkward boy, he was this gorgeous, tanned, masculine guy and of course I fell for him. What can I say, its inevitable. My childhood best friend turned into my high school crush, but we never talked. I accepted the fact that we would never be together but then he came on holiday with me and my family. When we began the journey to Durban from Joburg, I was convinced that I didn't like Mason anymore and Dustan and I hadn't even begin talking yet. 10 days in the same house as Mason obviously changed my mind about him. He was this cool guy that didn't seem to phased about anything. In my eyes he seemed perfect. But theres always a catch, he was a player. He flirted with every girl he talked to (including me.) While we were in Durban, I started talking to Dunstan. And from there on my feelings were all over the place and I didn't know what to do. Nothing special happened during that holiday, expect I got closer to Chase in a very friendly way.

***

I looked in the mirror one last time. Mascara wasn't smudged and my hair was perfectly straight, ready to go I thought. Today was the day of Fantasia, a music festival for under 18's. I was going with my friends Annabelle and Lola. I knew that Dunstan and Chase were both going to be there, so the whole day I'd been going through conversations in my head that I would have with them. I was panicking. I didn't want to talk to them and mess up. My head was a mess, I still didn't know who I liked. Chase seemed like a chilled guy but I knew he didn't want to be with men the way I wanted. Dunstan on the other, we hadn't talked since I'd told him I liked him, which was more than a month before. I was determined to play hard to get and not them see the effects they had on me. I held my chin up and dramatically flipped my hair.

As we walked into Fantasia, Lola and Annabelle were on either side of me as a sort of 'safety net.' As we walked in, there was a long net as a sort of entrance. I looked to my left and of course the first person I saw was Dunstan. He was in a white shirt and trousers. He was standing with his best friend, Liam. Liam was pretty much the same as Dunstan. Too tall, too awkward. They both stared right at me, so I put on my brave face and looked straight ahead. Inside my head I was in complete shut down mode. Of course I'd told myself that I didn't like Dunstan anymore, but now I knew that was a lie because as soon as I saw him my heart exploded and my stomach turned into a forest. There were a lot of people at Fantasia, but of course I only had eyes for Dunstan right there and then. Two hours had passed and he still hadn't come and said hi to me. I knew things were gonna be awkward but I had a small hope that he would just throw his arms around me and never let me go. Reality had hit me, Dunstan was not right for but I still kept looking for him in the crowd.

Annabelle and I went to get some drinks and in the drinks tent was Chase. How my luck continues. I really wanted to avoid both Dunstan and Chase today but the venue is so fucking small that its impossible. As Chase started walking towards me, I don't know what happened but I think my brain stopped working for like 10 seconds I made eye contact with him and turned around. Like what the fuck is wrong with me, what kind of person see's there crush and turns around because they're too scared to talk to them. I think I need therapy!

Annabelle, Lola and I were standing near the stage when Liam and Dunstan started waling towards us. For the past about 3 hours, they've been looking in my direction, then turning and talking to each other, then walking towards and then turning around and they carried on doing that for quite a while. It gave me a sense of hope that maybe things between me and dustan can still be saved. As they walked toward, I didn't turn around (again). "Hey Haley," Liam said and leaned in for a hug. Hugging tall guys is really amazing because you get to go on your tippy toes and put your arms around there neck and ahhhh its just amazing. Next Dunstan came in for a hug and he's taller than Liam so It was even better. I have to confess, this was the first time I'd ever hugged Dunstan and it was pretty nice. They walked away after they said hi, which I guess was best because the conversation could have got really awkward. The rest of the night we didn't talk until later when Annabelle ditched me with Dunstan to dance. That was probably the sink most awkward moment of my life, dancing with my crush and his best friend. They hugged me goodnight later on and I have to admit I was pretty upset that nothing else happened but I guess Dunstan is really shy.

***

When I got home last night, I checked my phone and had a text from Dunstan.

'Thanks for the great night ;)'

In my head I was like what the fuck? We hardly talked at Fantasia and now you say this, but anyway.

'Thank you :)'

About 10 minutes later I get a message

'So I was trying to try you this the whole night, so her it goes, I kinda like.