The Gap Year

the begining of the end.

It's an obnoxiously loud banging behind my locked doors that shakily wakes me up from my restless slumber.

Just as I start thinking it could just be some kid trying to mess around with the neighbours, and my eyes start drooping again, the bang continues.

I sigh irritatedley and push the welcoming warmth of my sheets away from me. A chilly woosh hits me harshly as I try swiping the sleep out of my eyes. I pinch the bridge of my nose, trying to motivate myself to get up once I've decided that the banging is too loud to ignore. 

"I'm coming!" I finally let out an angry scream, making the knocking die down for the time being. Sitting up, I lazily glide my arms around the bed in hopes of finding my phone. I catch it while it dangles from my bed right before it gets the chance to leap onto the hard, cold floor. The same one that makes me cringe upon it's contact with my feet.

Standing up, I click on my screen, making it reveal that it is 4:38 a.m. and that I have several notifications.

I sigh with the thought of the few hours of sleep I've managed to get. My mind starts working on exagerated and impossible probabilities of who is behind my interrupted peace. The knocks start again as I make my way to the door.

Unlocking my phone, I go through my missed calls. Five from my mother and sister each, and a few others from my flatmate.

"I said I'm coming!" I nearly roar as I open the door harshly, certain that I probably did some sort of expensive damage to it. I'm hit with a pang of dissapointment when I see who's behind it all, fist up and ready to knock again.

"What? Don't tell me you forgot your keys again? And what are you doing here so late? I thought you had to get up early for work tomorrow? Sorry, it's not even tomorrow anymore- in a few hours. And I thought you were staying over at-" I angrily ramble on, but get interrupted. As if they weren't rude enough already..

"Have you seen the news?" My sleep interruptor asks.

"I- What? You woke me up to chit chat about the fucking news?"  I ask.

"No, I mean-" this time they get interrupted as my phone starts vibrating. I hold a finger up, asking for a moment of silence while I confusedly stare at my phone.

I look up at the face I could gladly punch right now and then back down as I answer.

"Uh.. hey mum" I say and see eyebrows furrow. My flatmate starts an over dramatic head shake, stretching an arm for me to pass the phone.

"What? No.. What's going on, are you okay? Why are you calling this late and-" I fail to hear the rest of her sentence as my flatmate takes the phone out of my lazy grip.

"Hey, yeah, not yet, uh-huh, okay, I'll let you know, good night" I hear in the small moments between my mum's muffled voice, hanging up right after and giving the device back to me.

"Uh.. alright then" I say, scrunching my face up in further confusion.

"Sorry to wake you up like that. I just.. I- I don't know how to approach this-"

"Could've set your thoughts straight and then come bother me, you know?" I interrupt the ongoing ramble and walk into my- our apartment. Hearing the door close, I flop down onto the small couch we managed to squish into during movie marathons. My thoughts about how we ended up with such a crappy piece of furniture are taken to a halt when the voice continues and feet shuffle closer to me.

"How are you doing? You know, with everything about-" 

"Don't you dare say that name right now. Please, just-  if you want to talk about that then it can wait until tomorrow." I once again abruptly interrupt and jump onto my feet and start walking back towards my room.

"I can't think about it right now, it hurts too much. I'm going back to bed. Was that all?" I ask, rubbing my face in hopes of keeping calm and not having an other breakdown or punching the wall- or both.. Wouldn't be the first time of the day, if I'm being honest. 

"Yes- No, no no- I just- Listen to me"

"I can't listen to anything right now. I'm going back to sleep if that's fine with you" I say a bit too harshly.

The last thing I see before I shut my door locked are furrowed eyebrows over shiny eyes and quaky lips trying to find words that I did not have the mental or physical energy to listen to.

And the last thing I hear before I burry my head in pillows are more bangs on my door and muffled begs to open up alongside some useless jiggles on the door knob.

____________________________________

Hey! Thanks for clicking into the torture that is my writing. I've had the idea for this story for quite a while and was ready to publish some months ago but had several technical difficulties which resulted in my first few and most important chapters being deleted so I gave up in total frustration.

This first chapter is, as the title says, the beginning of the end.. so it's not where the story starts from but what it's going to end up on. To be honest I'm not quite sure what's going to happen throughout the whole story, however I am 100% sure of the ending so that's why I decided to write it first before I could consider changing my mind haha.

Anyway, please please please leave any feedback or comments you might have and give it a little star if you liked it!