I'm sorry

Stupid boy+smart girl= stupid girl

A bad decision from the start. He was the best friend that should of stayed that way. Untrusting, unfaithful, careless, without a conscious, he was the bad guy. He played the role as perfect guy, the best. But it was just a mask. Not for me. Dodging a bullet. He made me feel like a outsider, but he made me embrace it. He gave me hope and then took it away. This time I got a taste of my own medicine. If only he knew who I was truly. I tried to do things perfect with him. But he was not my past lover, and "perfect" wasn't in his vocabulary. Loving flaws wasn't in his comprehension. Being comfortable with your flaws with the person you have feelings for isn't for us. I'm sure it was my fault, as usual. Like he said, it was all for me, he was thinking about me how it was best for ME that we stay clear of each other. Ah yes, words very familiar to me. Yes yes I think I've said them and even to him. He used my own words against me. Like he used my words as if I didn't tell them. As if it was some other girl that had previously broke his heart. And he used her way out on me. I saw him as a fresh start, I had faith, I put my everything into the us for once, but maybe I put too much in, forgetting that he had to do some work too. I was giving 90% he was 10%. It worked but it wasn't enough. He was the all perfect boy I thought. Something HAD to be wrong with him, there had to be some catch. Oh there was, a huge catch. Catch where he met someone new through me and told me he wanted to be her friend for me. Lying to the girl that should have known better. Lying to the girl that had so much pain in her heart. Broke up a month before my birthday. He planned to make me brownies. That cute dork. I picked him over some pretty boy playing passionate lover. Maybe it would have been better, but I wanted a dork. A loser, the kind that fall for the hot girls and worship them. However I mixed up my dorks. And I got the dork that was a bad kid, stupid, girls cheated on him, so maybe he shouldn't care much about girls. Too insecure. Maybe be wanted someone safe too, and I couldn't give him that. I'm no ones safe option. I'm a problem needing to be handled. I need someone to understand I won't be nice to them. And he didn't. He never understood. Maybe Bc I was too complicated. Maybe he just didn't care. But he put on a show at least. I changed for him. I was nice and sweet, I treated him as my priority and I needed to care for him. But I guess he didn't want that, he wanted a girl that was less of the hassle, that was easier. Which is exactly what he got. A girl that had 20 boyfriends in one year. Good job for you. After the break up he simply handed me off to my ex, telling him to take care of me. I hid my complicated side but it was there, when he asked too opinionated questions. There's not much I can say about this guy. Only knew him as him for two weeks then in a flash it was gone and we both ran our separate ways. Two weeks accompanied by each other. Two weeks!! T W O B L O O D Y W E E K S. That's terrible. Certainly not with my tears. Not worth my over thinking and sadness that my other boyfriends got. No this one. Was a mistake and a terrible one. I did learn from it, and I'm greatful at least for that. I don't hate him, I understand him. Farewell.