It was Christmas. The type of holiday for a fun family gathering. Everyone was there, and then you were there. Funny how my brain knows we're not together anymore. We were ignoring each other all through out. Though I didn't want to, it seems I always find myself having a glimpse at you, you were glowing, and it was odd. But you, you ignored me well. As if I really don't exist.
The venue was in a hotel. It had bright blue-painted walls, white columns that supported the ceilings, christmas decorations of sorts hang on the walls with their colorful layouts. It was a perfect venue for a large number of people. It wasn't grand, the bright-blue wall paint gave the lobby a home-styled ambiance so that guests would feel themselves at home. The lobby was spacious, and a large staircase which was fixed on the side on a large window, that leads to the 2nd floor. The 2nd floor was an open space and a cut through for a view on the 1st floor. The lobby had a fireplace which was centered on the wall. Beside the fireplace was the Christmas tree. So tall that it extended on the railings of the 2nd floor. My side of the family rented the hotel for christmas. There were dozens of visitors. Relatives, children, friends, and gifts. Even my cousin's ex girlfriend was there with her new girlfriend, and a few friends that likes me were there as well.
I was the one who assisted and accompanied the guests to their rooms. I lead a lot of them to their respective rooms, but the moment had come to where I have to lead yours. Ofcourse, while you were following me, there was no talking, no eye contact, no anything. We came to your room, and pointed you towards it. Your room was beside an all-girls-guest room. I thought to myself, "ha, pretty sure he's glad about his neighbors". I know you too well. You then bumped into one of the girls of your neighboring room. I was surprised because the girl was one of my cousin's ex girlfriend's friends, which means this was their room. So, you apologized, had a chat, and you were smiling. In front of me. As if telling me you don't care. I don't know if you were doing it on purpose. Suddenly a guy followed through and went in your room. It was your friend. Then you guys talked in front of me, and kept talking about how lucky about the room you got. I did't want to get hurt, because I thought I was okay. But, it struck my heart like a sting of a bee. Knowing you've already moved on and happy without me. I thought, you always were. So I left and accompanied the other guests.
The event came, the exchanging of gifts. Because of the large number of guests, we had to start it mid-day. Everyone was really happy. Laughters of children, loud chats of adults, sounds of clattering plates, the ripping of gift wraps, distributing of gifts and happy conversations. And then I saw you. Handing out gifts to every girl you see. Walking and passing in front of me, like a real ghost. So I walked away. Those girls were talking about you and the gifts you gave. They even showed it to me. They were black beaded-bracelets, like the ones the monks have. I thought to myself, what's his trip? Is he this cheap now?" Then they asked me, if I received one. I said no and I don't care. I think the people around me heard it, then started asking questions. Weren't we together? Where's your gift for me? Am I ok? Silly questions. Ofcourse I am. But why am I having this heavy feeling?
I started roaming and checking into guests while everyone was gift giving. Because there were a lot of guests, they were exchanging gifts EVERYWHERE. Everyone was having the time of their lives. Your two friends were the liveliest ones. They were running around the corridor greeting and talking to everybody. I was going up the stairs where a bag of gifts were being given to the children. An adult was holding the bag of gifts, shouting out names and children were running and forming a line for the gifts. Others were reaching to the bag and getting their own gifts. I went up the stairs and saw your friend. He just came out of your room. He was saying something, he was talking so fast. He doesn't even make any sense. He was not even talking about you. So I interrupted him and just asked if he saw you. They said they didn't. I bumped into them a few times in the corridor and asked them the same questions all over.
