I woke up with a start from my nightmare. I groped for him. To my horror, the bed was empty. Suddenly I heard a gentle gurgle of the water from the bathroom. I heaved a sigh of relief.
Far across the room, the French windows allowed the moonlight to flood in. It was a gentle summer night. Silently I stood up and headed for the kitchen. From the top of the staircase I saw a newly furnished nursery room. My eyes began to fill with tears. I hurried down the steps.
Once down, I got hold of my emotions. God, my baby... I hated myself for the terrible, horrible, disgusting mistake. I held back the tears. I did not want Xavier te see me crying. I stared into the murky coffee in ny hands. Slowly, I decided to take a fresh breath of air outside. I sat at the patio staring at the velvety sky, twinkling with diamonds of the night.
Memories came rushing to my mind. We had met at the library while we were both studying. I was attracted to him almost immediately. Who would not? He was tanned, muscular and towered above his friends at six feet five. Not to mention his handsome looks. He was such a striking man. He was square-jawed, had those sexy, romantic eyes, a stubborn chin and his eyes... he had the eyes that seemed to pierce right into your soul. His soft, flowing, brown black locks were such a contrast to his eyes. No wonder, he was the idol in the university.
He made his first move a week after our first encounter. I was shocked. It was a Saturday morning and the library was deserted. I was thumbing through the dusty volumes on Egyptian Civilization when a deep baritone startled me. I looked up and there he stood in his khaki pants and black shirt. I was speechless. He flashed me a smile and said, " I have been staring at you for days but you just brushed me off. "
I had no answer for that. " Err... I thought you were interested in the plants, " I said, pointing to the potted plants above my head. He laughed and asked me for dinner and he had the audacity to give me his first kiss that very evening. Needless to say, we went steady and later married in style at his parents' mansion in Long Island.
That was three years ago. Xavier is now carving out his own engineering empire. I, on the other hand, am doing research work with National Geographics.
I stared at the moon. I should never have made that rash judgement. I was pregnant for two months. Xavier did not know and I wanted to surprise him. He was emphatic that he did not want one. I was devastated. After all he always said that he loved children. We had a heated argument and I did not speak to him for days.
One week later, I came home earlier than expected. I opened the door and saw Xavier embracing a young blonde woman, his secretary. I stopped dead in my tracks. Humiliation, fury, anger and sadness poured into my heart. Yet I was calm " Xavier, I am pregnant, I see the picture now. I'll file for a divorce. " With that, I slammed the door and quickly took my Porche to my Rhode Island apartment.
I called Patrick, Xavier's father and told him about us getting divorced. He was shocked and begged me to tell him what was wrong but I kept quiet. I cried my heart out. I trusted Xavier, loved him with all my heart and this was how he treated me. I slept alone that night, wishing that he was beside me, remembering all those passion-filled nights we spent together. His caresses, his voice, his touch... I cannot live without him.
The next morning he rushed into my apartment demanding to talk to me. I refused and he lunged at me. Frantically, I stepped out of his reach and he toppled down the stairs. Horrified, I grabbed him but lost my footing. I stumbled down the stairs. My last thoughts were that I still loved him to save him from falling down the stairs. Then, everything went dark.
I woke up in a hospital. Xavier was unshaven and his eyes bloodshot. I was in coma for three days and he never left my side. I had lost the baby. I cried and Xavier cradled me in his arms. He told me that Phyllis, his secretary had just discovered that her husband had cheated her and asked for his help. There was nothing more than that. I was so ashamed for doubting him. It was terrible mistake that took away the baby.
" Honey, what are you doing here? " It was Xavier who had come out from the bathroom. I turned and gasped. " I'm thinking of our baby, " I said and wept. He held me and cooed. " Come on, sweetheart, don't cry. It's not your fault. " But I still could not stop crying. He pushed me slightly and tilted my chin. He smiled softly and his eyes glittered. " I tell you what. Why don't we make a baby tonight? I promise you'll like it, honey. We'll have dozens of kids. "
I smiled at him telling myself how lucky I was to have him. Slowly he brought his lips to mine and kissed me passionately. He lifted me into his arms and carried me inside, leaving the undisturbed scenery of the night.
