How do you annoy Voldemort?

Just a few ways to irritate/ embaress/harass Lord Voldemort (then be prepared to die...)

(I was bored and had no internet and Microsoft word was right there so I was like hey, why not!)

Warning: May contain spoilers!

1.Kill his pet snake.

2.Laugh at his nose...or shall I say lack of nose.

3.Constantly remind him that no one loves him.

4. Refuse to stop constantly reminding him.

5. Ask him if he ever had braces.

6. Tell him he's dead...

7. Eat his pet snake.

8. Call him moldy voldy!

9.  Play the Mysterious Ticking Noise over and over again.

10.Mock the fact he has no eyebrows.

11.Ask him why he doesn’t wear shoes.

12.Run around waving the sword of Griffindor in his face.

13.Call yourself the Dark Lord.

14. Advise Anger management classes.

15.Remind him that he can’t even kill a little boy.

16.Smile happily.

17. Buy him a box of heart shaped chocolates.

18.Ask him if he’s sure he’s not a girl.

19.Poke him repeatedly.

20.Give him a wig as a birthday present.

21. Draw scars all over his face when he’s sleeping.

22. Propose to him.

23. Ask him to hook you up with Draco.

24.Kill Dumbledore then steal the elder wand for yourself.

25.Run around under an invisibility cloak.

26. Be Harry Potter.

27. Don’t die when he tries to kill you.

28.Tell him he can’t be the most powerful wizard if he hasn’t got a beard.

29. Get him a Harry Potter action figure.

30.Ask him if he has a sore throat. Recommend strepsils.

31. Ask him if he was any good at Quidditch.

32. Basically just ask him loads of inane random questions.

33. Slice his snake in half.

34. Buy him a stress banana.

35. Tell him he has a freakish laugh

36. Snitch on Snape.

37. Run up to him and give him a great big hug.

38. Paintball him pink!

39.Take him to the cinema to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2.

40. Laugh when he dies.

41. Remind him again that he should be dead.

42. Buy him a COD game. Explain to him what a gun is.

43. Set your Labrador on him.

44. Ask him why his head looks like a melon.

45. Hit him across the head then say....sorry...there was a fly.

46. Have a Harry Potter dress-up day!

47. Tell him his breath stinks.

48. Tell him he’s way overdue on that dentist appointment.

49. Ask him if he’s a goth.

50. Glitterize his wand.

51.  Tell him you know a good plastic surgeon because that look’s not working for him.

52.  Give his snake to a zoo.

53.   For Christmas get him the set of Harry Potter books.

54.  Tell him he should read them then learn from his mistakes.

55.  Make him watch High School Musical.

56.  Take him shopping to Hollister. Say his robes were getting a bit old.

57.   Say he should buy his turban back.

58.   Tell him Bellatrix is in love with him.

59.  Buy him some fake tan.

60.  Tell Bellatrix he’s gay.

61.    Hum the Harry Potter theme tune at Death Eater meetings.

62.  Show him pictures of when he was a baby.

63.   Tell him Bellatrix killed Harry Potter

64.  Tell him that Justin Bieber wants a fight.

65.  Sing Justin Bieber songs to him.

66.  Tell him that the sorting hat made a mistake and he should have been in Hufflepuff.

67.   Blame it on Draco.

68.   Blame it on Lucius.

69.  Blame it on Bellatrix.

70.  Take him to Disneyland.

71.    Summon him only to help you open a bottle of milk.

72.   Make him a snake sandwich.

73.   Pretend to be him for a few hours by use of polyjuice potion.

74.   Call him ‘my sugar daddy!’

75.   Ask to ride his snake.

76.   Hit him in the face with a killing curse, now he can feel special too.

77.   Ask him if he drinks Red Bull to get his wings.

78.   Hide the Elder wand under the couch.

79.  Call him a wimp because he has to have 7 lives to fight a teenager.

80.  Last but not least, show him this list.

So, if you ever decide to do any of these things, please do not hold me responsible if he decides to kill you.

With Love

Ari <3