Ex-teacher

Introduction

Ex-teacher

I always was a tall kid in school and out of school I still am tall at 6ft I guess this is one of the main reasons for the years of toment I was put though. I hated school as a kid. And when I say hated I mean really hated. I had gotten bullied since I was 7 and it continued all though out my time in school.This is the story of the one meeting that changed my life.... I was 19 at the time and had left school at the age of 16 only to continue to go to college until the legal age of 18 so i had been out of education for just a year. I had no friends until I met Nemo and he became my first i met him in treatment. Yes. I went to a treatment center and unlike all of the other things you have probably read or seen it wasn't actually that bad. Well it was at first but after about 2 weeks I got used to it. I got admited to the center for self harm, eating disorder and eventually a suicide attempt. It was a Thursday. Thursday the 27th of May 2015 to be precise. The day began in a fairly normal manner. Nemo woke me up at 7 am Sharp shortly followed by breakfast. I came out of treatment not even a week before so I was used to a tight schedule but Nemo had been out of treatment for over a month. We had met though our similar music taste. Nemo had approached me in the music room and just started talking to me like I wasn't a stranger. It was his looks that pulled me in the most. Nemo had light brown almost blond shaggy hair he had a small hole in his lip where you could tell he had previously had a lip pearcing but we had to take all jewellery out as soon as we arrived. We hit it off instantly and became best friends. Before you ask no. We are not dating. let me tell you something about Nemo. Nemo is extremely extremely gay. like over the top gay. and to be honest so am I. I guess you're wondering why I always call him Nemo. well that's because when we were in Treatment together the nurses always lost him because of his short height at 5ft 3 i guess he just took on the nickname Nemo. his real name is Nicholas but he will kill you if you call him that. Sorry i keep getting off track. So. the group. So far I had been to only 3 group therapy Sessions.
to be honest the thought of going and meeting New people terrified me. In treatment they diagnosed me with social anxiety along with bipolar and anorexia so things like this were still hard. But I guess I had to go see we had to be in therapy and group therapy until John the leader of the group and everybody in the group's
therapist saw that we were capable to care for ourselves without as much of the support I knew I needed to go because as I was not in the Treatment Centre I wouldn't have as much support as I did in there so I knew it was going to be much harder to not relapse. luckily The group wasn't like any other group therapy I had been to. It was amazing we would play games and do activities after we had introduced ourselves to any new members. It was also of all ages and all problems so anything from 15 with anorexia (Lexi) to 35 with a drug problem (Charlie) all of the other members were really nice and kind. Anyway that introduction was too long so lets just get on with the story.

Lola's POV- 27th of May 2015

As I brushed my light brown hair looked in the mirror I studied myself. I could see the strands of hair that hung loosly off my head in a manner that annoyed me. My bright baby blue eyes were the only thing I liked about my face. I couldn't say I hated myself anymore because since i went into treatment my views have changed but i still disliked my body.

I am so nervous. It is my forth group session today and it is still terrifying. Yes I have made a few friends there already but I HATE meeting new people and last time John said that there was one new person coming today. New people make me really anxious and when I get anxious I... NO! I CAN'T! I have worked so hard to get to this point in recovery and I can't ruin it all now.

"NEMO" I shout across the flat. Yes. We own a flat. It has 3 bed rooms and 1 bathroom. We have a kitchen witch there is not really much point to as both me and Nemo can't cook. We have a fairly big living room and a study/ music room. Nemo enters the music room and knocks me out of my train of thought. "Yes Lo" he says making me jump.
"How long until John will be here?" I question as I look at the floor whilst playing with my My Chemical Romance guitar pic bracelet. I hear foot steps as he walks closer. Nemo grabs my face and makes me look at him but me being the awkward person I am looks everywhere but at him. "Lola I have been going to this group for over a month and you have been going for a week. Everything is going to be okay. I promise" he says as he makes eye contact with me and pulls me into his chest. I love hugs from Nemo they always make everything better. I suddenly jump up and run and grab my guitar. "Nemo, Nemo, Nemo you have to hear this I have beens working on it all day." I say as I begin to pluck the intro to the song I had spent all day creating. Firstly I sang softly " why do I try. I try so hard yet I can't suvive" I begin to gain confidence and sing a little louder "what does this mean. What you do to me." I feel my voice falter but I continue "I can't compete with her, with him. I-" I get cut off by the door bell. "Sorry Lo" Nemo looks down "it was amazing though" he continues with a small smile to make me feel better but I can tell he hated it. I grab my red converse and my red and black check shirt to put over my black Bring Me The Horizon tee as I can tell it is John at the door. Nemo was the only one to ever see me in a t-shirt or shorts since my 'problems' started because I know I can be myself around him and he won't judge me.
"Lola!" John greeted me as he pulled me in to a hug. John was a tall man but not much taller than me about 6ft 3. He is in his mid thirties. 34 if I had to guess. He has short black quiff like hair and he treets us all like his kids And family even the older members. Yeah we are one big very dysfunctional family.
"Hi John" I say quietly as I start playing with my bracelet again. "SHOTGUN" Nemo shouts racing ahead leaving me to lock up. I sigh as I grab the keys out of my pocket "sure Lola since you are a girl and you are still terrified you can have the front seat for once" I mutter under my breath and I forget im not alone until I hear a low throaty laugh come from John. I turn to look at him "its fine Lola I will kick him out and you can sit in the front" he says surprising me.
"No, no its okay John I don't want any fuss or fighting" I say as I get in to the back of the car.