SoMo imagines

Never enough

He pushes me away and I say nothing. He calls me names and I say nothing. But what bugs me the most is that he never says I love you anymore but that's the three words I always seem to say. Hey I'm Addy and I'm hopelessly and miserably in love with someone who doesn't love me back.

Joe and I have had some problems over the last two years that we've been together. It started when he was cheating on me last year with some girl named Olivia. I only took him back because he apologized so many times and even had tears welling in his eyes. It was easier to forgive him because Joe told me they weren't even sleeping together, they just kissed a few times. Of course it tore me up inside but I stayed with him.

I'm just gonna go upstairs and sleep for a while, since I've already cooked his dinner.

   *joe's p.o.v*

I knew what I was doing to addy was wrong but when you lose a certain spark in a relationship it's hard to get it back. Sneaking around with Olivia was extremely wrong but lying to addy was even worse. I told her a year ago when she found out that I was cheating on her that me and Olivia never slept together but we obviously did and still are because that's what I was just doing.

I left Olivia's apartment with her whining that I come back but I couldn't, I had to go see addy. While in the car I thought of some things.

Addy thinks that I don't love her but I do just not in a relationship way anymore. I loved her as a person and I couldn't imagine a life without her. As a matter of fact I wouldn't be able to live with myself if she left.

I finally made it to our apartment and heard music playing and I knew exactly what it was. It was a cd that I made for her of me singing her favorite songs to help her sleep. It's hard to explain but awhile ago when she first found out I was cheating on her she starting having nightmares; they obviously had something to do with me and the hurt she felt. Addy loves my singing voice for some reason, she always thought I should take up singing but I'm not so sure. Anyways every night before she went to sleep I would sing her to sleep, but I couldn't be there every night because of work and other obvious reasons so I made her a whole cd of different songs that I recorded for her.

I went upstairs and saw her awake sitting up on our bed listening to the cd.

I frowned. "Thought you were asleep". She only ever listens to this when she's about to go to sleep. She looks at me with sorrow in her eyes and I immediately felt bad.

"That would be a real inconvenience for you wouldn't it. Coming home late at night from being out with that girl all day and me being awake right. I wouldn't want you to not be able to sneak in. I'm never enough for you am I, she broke that sharp painful stare while I just stood there frozen.

"Addy what are you talking about I was at work and you know th-, she cut me off and stood up coming towards me. She pulled down my shirt a bit to reveal all these hickies from Olivia.

"Cut the crap Joe you thought this whole time I didn't know what you were doing. I know you're still seeing her and I know that when you said you didn't sleep with her you did and you still are" she was yelling but calmed down into this tiny broken voice. "Just stop t-there's nothing left for you to lie about okay just stop", she finished with a tiny sob and then broke down completely on the bed.

I moved towards her slowly and reached my hand out on her shoulder to calm her a bit but she removed it from herself then got up and went towards the closet. I knew what happened next so I screamed wait just as she brought a fully packed suitcase out of he closet.

"Please don't leave me. I know you don't believe me addy but please I do love you, i was on my knees with my hands clasped together. Next thing I knew she had slapped me and folded her arms in anger.

"I waited two years for you to say those words again and you chose when I'm about to leave to say it. Fuck you Joe,  and with that she ran down the stairs and out of my life. I broke down crying and I wasn't really sure why. I said myself I didn't want to be in a relationship with her but I don't want to live without her. I was so confused with my head and my heart that I didn't even know what to do with myself but cry.

*Two years later in Addy's pov*

I just finished my shift at the coffee shop that was a couple of blocks from where my new apartment was. When I left Joe I went to live with my best friend for awhile until I got a job and saved up for my own apartment which I recently bought two months ago. I changed everything about me; my hair color, my willingness, my dignity, my strength and my belief in myself.

I haven't seen or talked to Joe since the day I left two years ago. I obviously missed him like crazy and it tore me apart every night when I tried to go to sleep but I couldn't go back he's probably in a committed relationship with that girl Olivia.

I hopped into my car and got going. When I turned on the radio I was skipping to different stations when I suddenly had to stop the car because of a certain voice. I would recognize it anywhere because I used to listen to it every night before bed and from time to time I still do; it was Joe.

"Alright you're listening to Jd103.5 and we're on live with a breakthrough artist who goes by the name of SoMo the one and only Mr. Joseph SoMo here to introduce his new single Fallin Up, the interviewer speaks through the radio and my heart dropped.

"Thanks Bryan it's great to be here, I heard joes voice and broke out in a sob. I couldn't believe it was actually him. "So joe tell what the song is about and what the inspiration is behind it".

"Oh well it's about a sickeningly sweet romance where a person can't bring himself/herself to love anybody else because of how engrossed they are in the relationship. I actually wrote it about my ex-girlfriend addy who I treated wrong but I love and still love her very much and would do anything to get her back, he sound really upset explaining that. When the interview went off the song came on and I started driving back to my home; the song finally finished and I was at my house.

I got really confused when I saw another car in the driveway. I grabbed my mace inside my purse and my phone to get ready to call the cops. When I stepped inside all the lights were off and when I turned them on I dropped my phone and mace on the floor at who was in front of me.

"Joe what are you doing here and how did you get in my apartment, I blinked a couple of times to make sure he was actually there.

"Addy you shouldn't keep a spare key under your doormat and I'm here to apologize for what I did. I'm so sorry I never meant to hurt you. I know now that Olivia was just a fling and you're the only girl for me. I love you addy, he came towards me and held my arms.

"Joe I love you too but-, he cut me off. "Then please just say you forgive me and let me try to make it up to you".

"I forgive you but I'm not rushing back into a relationship it's gonna take a lot more then you coming in here and just apologizing, I explain to him and he breaks into a tiny smile.

"I know that and I will be here through it all to prove to you, he hugged me tightly and didn't let go for awhile. I found myself hugging him back.

We laid together on the couch after we got done hugging, talking about everything and anything. It felt nice to be back in his arms, I thought to myself.