My friend, Richard, and I were walking to go get some pizza. It was something we did on a regular basis. We would go to Little Caeser's and pick up a pizza, then head over to CVS to buy some Monsters. While we were walking, he started complaining about the heat. "Stop being a little bitch. It's hot everytime we go. What do you expect when you're living in Texas?" I shot at him. "Yea but I'm concerned for your sake since you have that layer of fat. I'm sure you're burning up right now" He retorted. "Fuck you!" I replied with a smile. We kept walking and Richard kept complaining. Which wasn't unusual. He always found something to complain about, but today it was different. "Dude? Are you feeling ok?" Suddenly, he collapsed. "RICHARD! Dude, can you hear me?!?" I picked him up and ran home. I needed to get him some place cool. While I ran, I pulled out my phone. "Hello. 9-1-1. What's your emergency?" "My friend just collapsed! I need an ambulance. My address is 1748 Sandy Dale Dr. Please hurry." I tried to wake him up again, but he remained unconscious. The sirens sang out in the distance and they slowly got closer. I picked him up again and ran outside to meet the ambulance. They got him on a stretcher and put him in the back. I jumped in with him and they started working on him. " What happened? Why did he pass out?" "I dont know! We were just walking to go get some food and he just passed out. Is he going to be ok?" "Don't know yet" We got to the hospital and they rolled him into the E.R. They took him to a different section and forced me to stay behind.
A few hours later, doctors came out from where they were holding Richard. They walked towards me and I jumped out of my seat to talk to him " Is he ok? What happened? Can I go see him?" "You....might want to sit down for this...we rehydrated your friend and brought him back to consciousness...but upon doing so...we decided to take a further look. We took a blood sample and studied it. Upon observation, we found cancer cells. It's no ordinary cancer. We found in the blood sample that all other blood cells were being destroyed by the cancer cells within minutes...Within 6 minutes...only the cancer cells remained. That is why your friend became unconscious. There wasnt enough oxygen flowing through his body due to the lack of red blood cells. We are going to start putting him through therapy tomorrow and all we can do now is hope for the best." After that, the doctor walked away. "Cancer....how could he..." was all I could squeak out. Not here Bryan. Not here. I walked over to the front desk to ask where Richard was being held. After getting that information, I went to the room he was being held in. I was ambivalent to enter the room, but I had to see my friend. Suddenly, the door opened and a doctor came walking out. "Are you here to see Richard?" he asked. "Yes!" I replied. He gestured for me to go in, and I accepted his invitation. Richard never liked the milieu of hospitals, and now that he was a patient in one, he was freaking out. I tried to mitigate the situation, but it's not easy telling your best friend he has cancer.
I stayed with Richard all day, but it came to a point where I was asked to leave because visiting hours were over. Which is bullshit. Richard is my brother, I should be able to stay with him 24/7, One of my friends picked me up from the hospital and she drove me home. I stepped inside my house, closed the door behind me, locked it, went to my room, and there was when I broke. I couldn't fight it any longer. I screamed and cried and shouted and punched anything in sight. This went on for hours until I had lost my voice and my eyes had ran dry. Even then, my body wouldn't stop shaking. I tried falling asleep, but everytime I closed my eyes, all I saw was Richard collapsing infront of me. There had to be something I could do about this. He was my brother. I had to protect him some how. But what could I do. I couldn't protect him in this fight that was raging on inside of him. He had to go through this on his own. I couldn't help him this time. All I could do, is be by his side and cheer him on.
The months had passed, and he was starting to get better. He had a spring in his step and it seemed like he was winning this fight. The doctors were even saying that his readings were much better than they had ever been. This was amazing. My brother was winning. There was nothing that was going to steal the life he loved so much from him. I was sitting in his room one day and he was hooked up to an I.V. to keep him hydrated. We were talking about God knows what. "Bryan, I think I'm only going to be here for one more month. I think this fight is over. I won Bryan. And you helped me through it. You never left my side. I can never repay you. Just know that I lov". He stopped mid-sentence. What happened next will forever be burned into my memory. He started bleeding from his eyes, nose, mouth, and ears. "DOCTOR!!!!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. The doctors rushed in and began to work on him. They strapped him to a gurney and rolled him to the E.R. I ran after them but when they got to the E.R., the nurses wouldn't let me go any further. I watched through the window on the door. After about an hour, they stabalized him and he was okay. But he wasn't okay. This was the start of something bad. After that, his condition got so much worse. It felt like, God was toying with us. Making everyone believe that he was getting better, then slapping us in the face with that. After that, I started hating "Our Lord and Savior".
3 months went by and everyday, Richard was getting worse. He was losing the color in his skin. He was losing the light in his eyes. He was losing the fire in his heart. He knew he was dying. He was giving up. Everytime I tried to pick him up in his lowest points, he would get tired and stop talking. He was ready to die. I tried to motivate him to keep going. I tried to remind him what he had to live for. I did anything I could. I begged him with tears in my eyes not to give up. Finally, he sat me next to his bed. He looked me in the eyes. "Bryan, you've been here for me from the start. You are my brother. I love you. That won't ever change. But I'm tired Bryan. And every day I live in constant pain. If you truly love me and care about me...You wouldn't want me to suffer through that. I'm not giving up because I don't care about the people in my life, and I'm not giving up because I don't want to see my future. I'm giving up because I cant keep living this way. But promise me something Bryan. Promise me after I'm gone, you won't go down a path you cant fix. Promise me you won't do anything to hurt yourself. Look me in the eyes and promise you will keep living for the both of us. Do you promise Bryan?" The tears were streaming down my face and I felt a lump in my throat. "I promise" I managed to choke out. I couldn't believe it. He had given up. And...I was ok with it. I didn't want my brother to suffer anymore. After I had made my promise, he leaned back in his bed, and he smiled. It was like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Like he could die in peace.
I woke up in a chair next to his bed. It was dark outside and it seemed like the hospital was empty. I looked around and I didn't see any doctors, any nurses, any custodial workers. There was no one around. Richard was asleep in bed. But....there was something different. He looked paler than usual. I touched his skin and it was ice cold. He wasn't breathing. He was gone. I couldn't cry. I was too dehydrated. All of my tears were gone. I sat by my friend's lifeless corpse. All the memories I had with Richard. I had known him since we were five. All the things we had been through together. All the fights we had survived together. All the wrecks we had gone through. All the heartbreaks we had gone through together and all the times we thought we would be living in million dollar houses and the futures we had planned out. His path came to an end. And it was up to me to carry out our dreams....I won't let you down Richard
