Looking at the picture of myself I was only ten at the time. I looked so adorable my hair in pigtails a big smile on face as I was on my dad’s shoulders. Loraine stood next to us annoyed at my little league game as I held the winning ball. I looked so happy, so full of innocence. Looking at my father’s face I look a lot like him his hair and his smile. Oh God how I miss my daddy but I’m doing everything for him. Daddy I miss you so much what did you leave me? Moving my fingers over the picture I wish I could rewind time but I can’t.
I hate remembering my past, my former life I lived. Remembering the wonderful childhood years I had with my former family. My teenage years being the worst. I know most don’t have deep hatred for their mother but I do. I realized crying for a mother that stopped caring for me isn’t worth it. No one knows who the new Maxine really is. Sometimes not even myself knows who the real me is. I know its bad for who I became but nothing will stop me at all. Final touches on my makeup and I’m ready for all of this.
I can see the stares and looks thrown at me.Being seated in front row as everyone is waiting for the bride. Her future husband dressed in a black tux smiling showing off his perfect white teeth. Robert seems to perfect to be true in my eyes, but mother loves calling him her ‘great love.’ I guess I hate hearing how she thinks he’s better than my father because he’s not and will never be.
Is it bad to say Robert will soon be a pawn in my game? He is a man and man all are the same in life. They want what they can’t have and Robert will want me like no other woman he has ever wanted. I will be honest I am more attractive than my mother and Loraine they have nothing on me. Mother is an aging beauty queen while Loraine let’s be serious she looks like some midget with big boobs. I have the long dark brown hair with gray eyes eyes and the body any woman would die to have. The long legs, height and the right amount of curves that fits all together making any man go crazy for me.
It’s May spring time as the wedding is in a country club. All the guest whispering to each other and smiling. The music starts as the bridesmaids began to walk down the aisle with the groomsmen on their arms. I see Loraine with her brown hair down in curls as she smiles. Her smile falter a little when she takes a look at the guest when her hazel eyes look at me wearing a dress that wasn’t planned. She tries not to let it affect her but it does.
As my mother walked down the aisle alone I am disgusted by how tight the dress is. Is it just me to say it’s too odd for her to get pregnant at this age? Everyone stares as my mother as she has a long ivory strapless dress. Her tan skin popping against the pale dress as she has a huge smile on her face. The type of smile I hate that makes me feel pure hate for her. She doesn’t deserve to be happy at all but I have to pretend I’m happy for her.
Nicholas smiling at the end of the aisle as it is more obvious as younger than my mother he is. I would lie to say the new man that would be my stepfather is hideous. He is so good looking that it would be illegal for him to be my stepfather. Light brown hair with hazel eyes even in a tux I can see of much of a great body he has. I feel bad for him marrying my bitch of a mother. He was going to waste all his good looks with a woman that was already loosing hers.
Looking at him I knew he would be the perfect pawn in this game. I can already see it the old woman finds her young husband fucking her young beautiful daughter how entertaining. In a way I find it disgusting with having to have her left over. Yes, Nicholas will be the answer to bringing her the worst pain.
A judge stood as the photographer snapped pictures of the “loving” couple. Mother’s bump was too noticeable and I couldn’t but hate her. She was bringing another child in the hell of her life. She fucked up my life and she would probably treat the new baby as Loraine. Loraine always the favorite as I was her boyish little girl. Look at me now mother I’m more woman than you’ll ever be. She would be pissed off if I told her it to her face.
