The Bad Boy Thinks I'm Cute

A Sudden Change

I throw on a grey, button down sweater and some jeggings. I slip on a pair of 2-inch black heels and apply light makeup with red lipstick. I wanted it to look like I threw something together quickly and didn't put much effect into what I looked like, even though I kind of did.

I wait for an hour for the knock on my window to come. At 9:00 pm it does. A light tap on my window sounds like thunder with the quiet atmosphere of my room. I peek through the curtains and see Ryan. It's kind of crazy I'm going with him, considering I just met him today...it might not be safe now that I think about. But like he said, you only live once, right?

I slide open the window and grab Ryan's hand as I step out onto the grass. I have to remind my mom soon how thankful I am for our one story home.

"Hold on. " I whisper.

I quietly slide my window back.

"How did you convince your parents not to check on you in your room for the rest of the night?" He smiles as we walk down the street to where he parked his car.

"If I don't have anything to study for I actually have to go to bed at nine. So they think I'm in bed. " I reply, a little bit of guilt budding in my stomach. If they find out, they won't trust me for months.

"Oh. So you're a good girl?" Ryan smirks and opens the door for me on the passenger side.

"You ever heard that Five Seconds of Summer song called Good Girls?" I wait and he shakes his head,"Well in it they say 'good girls are bad girls that haven't been caught'."

His smirk grows and he closes the door. The rest of the way we drive in silence until we pull up into a two story house with lights and music that can be seen and heard from the outside. There were people from our school outside on the lawn, some with red solo cups while others were looking a little tipsy and tripping around.

"I bet none of these kids are 21. They're all drinking. " I mutter in disgust.

"Don't you get it? Them knowing it's wrong is what makes them do it. They do it because they know they aren't allowed to and the thrill of being a rebel feels like you're on top of the world. "

"I take it you drink. " I smile over at him.

"Yeah a little. "

"You feel like you're on top of the world until you're throwing up and falling down above the toilet. "

"A side effect of fun. " He shrugs.

I laugh at him and then hop out of his car. I breathe in the air from outside and let it go in and out of my lungs. One half of me feels alive and free while the other half feels guilty and scared.

Ryan grabs my hand again and pulls me inside the house. When we get in the music is deafeningly loud and I flinch a little bit. Kids are dancing together, some are making out in the corners, while others just stand and talk.

"Wait here, ok babe?" Ryan shouts.

I nod my head and stand awkwardly in the middle of all these people alone. I should've listened to Avril and mot came with Ryan, clearly he is a party goer and a rule breaker. This'll end in some sort of trouble, but it is worth the risk. After about ten minutes without Ryan I check my phone to look less awkward. Where is he? If he doesn't come back soon I'm going to leave...

"Hey!" Ryan says, squeezing through two people. He drags out the -y in hey.

"You're back. I was getting worried. " I say, pushing some of my hair behind my ears.

"I'm not going anywhere. Unless..." He snakes an arm around my waist and pulls me closer.

"Unless?"

"Unless it's with you. " He whispers and I smell some sort of drink on his breath. So that's what took him so long.

"Ryan, have you been drinking?" I ask shakily as he pulls me through the crowd toward an empty corner.

"No, babe, why?"

"I smell it on you. " I say, my grip on his hand getting tighter.

"I just need a mint..." He drags out the words 'just' and 'need'.

"Ryan? Are you sure you haven't?" I back away from him towards the wall.

"Yeah think so. " He places his hands on my waist and pecks my nose.

I can't help but smile when he does that. I lift my arms around his neck and pull him a little bit closer to me. He leans down and plants a rough kiss on me, smashing my lips. My hands slide down to his chest and grip his shirt in my hands as his presses his hands against my lower back. He starts kissing me down my neck, raising goosebumps on my arms.

My hands tangle up in his hair as I let out out heavy breaths. He moves his lips on my collarbone and I let out a small moan. It's so wrong, but making out never hurt anyone. Even if he does smell like alcohol...

"You like that?" Ryan asks, his voice vibrating.

I just give him a small smile and he takes my hand once more.

"I know what you'll like. " He stares back at me and gives me a mischievous look.

All of a sudden my heart starts pounding and I feel like something isn't right. I don't have a good feeling about this. My stomach is full of knots and nervousness. My hands are shaking along with the pounding in my head from the loud music.

"Where are we going?" I ask shakily.

"The hallway upstairs. "

We get upstairs and then he slams me backwards into the wall, pressing my butt up against him. He presses wet kisses all over my neck, giving me a bad nervous feeling in my stomach. This has gone from something fun to something out of hand.

"Ryan," I manage. I close my eyes and breathe heavily.

I suddenly know what's going to happen. And I don't like it one bit. I struggle underneath him, but can't do much. His hands are roaming to places I don't want and it's making me weak. He turns me back around and kisses me right on my my mouth again and his hands are groping around my butt.

"Ryan, stop. Please. " I let out a breathy whisper. I can't be strong when he is kissing me like this.

"Shutup and just let me do what you want. " He rasps, slipping a hand up my thigh.

"Stop!" I say frantically.

"You want me to have sex with you. And I'm going to. " He snaps.

"Please. Stop. I don't want this. I never asked for this. Leave me alone!" I cry, tears slipping out of my eyes.

I feel his hand run down my back and I let out a desperate grunt. The pleasure I'm feeling isn't right. It's forced and desperate. I push my thighs together and Ryan lets out a frustrated breath. He picks me up and lays me on the ground, pins my arms above me, kisses me behind my ear, and starts removing his shirt.

"Stop! Please!" I scream this time, thrashing my legs as he slowly pulls down the waist of my pants, planting a kiss on my underwear line.

"Hold still so I can get it over with! "

"Stop! Someone help! Help! Please!" I scream and cry.

I look down at him as he puts one hand against my chest and the other haphazardly undoes his belt.

"No! No! Somebody help me!" I cry out, hot tears streaming down my face more now. I'm going to lose my virginity to this guy. He is going to have sex with me and there isn't anything I can do about it. "Help!"

"Shut the hell up!" Ryan shouts.

"Help!" I cry.

Just as Ryan is about to pull down my underwear I hear a low voice from behind me.

"Leave her alone. Now. "