Don't look back

Chapter four

My vision slowly came back and my body started to relax. I had spent the last year building that brick wall in my mind and it takes forever to go back. I realized that tears were welled in my eyes and sweat was pouring down my body. I took deep breaths and started whispering "My name is Everly Robinson. I'm 15 years old. I live in Houston, Texas. It came back. It won't stop, it won't go away..." I trailed off. I squeezed my eyes shut to the point of pain, reached over and turned my lamp off, and curled in the fetal position swathed in my covers. I instantly fell asleep and it was only 5:22. The rest of the week passed by in a blur and the weekend wasn't exciting either. Monday was when everything changed though. When my entire life would change. It was after school and I was saying after in Mr. Kasslin's class to makeup a quiz I failed. Mr. Kasslin spent the whole time sitting at his desk staring at me with a sly expression on his face. I sped through the quiz so I could leave as soon as possible. When I was done, I hastily threw it in the basket and had one hand on the door handle when he called me back. "Everly! Can you come here please?" I didn't want to but I knew I had to so I trudged over to him keeping a good 4 feet between us. Mr. Kasslin seemed to notice this and smirked. He didn't say anything. I remember that. He didn't say anything to me. He just stood up, walked around me, locked the door, and came back. He wrapped his arms around my waist and I almost passed out in fear. The black cloud started to come back and I worshipped it for the first time. I let it take ever. Let it do its thing, willing it to stay until he was done. And, surprisingly it did. I didn't realize when it left but when I finally opened my eyes, I was lying on the floor half naked and Mr. Kasslin was zipping up his jeans. I quickly pulled mine up and ran out the door and into the bathroom across the hall. I pushed open a stall and puked violently into the toilet. It seemed every bit of food I had consumed over the last week was coming out. For the next two weeks, school was unbearable. I considered switching out of tech theatre but I knew that would raise suspicion and questions I couldn't answer. Instead, I decided to ignore him. I didn't look at him. I didn't talk to him unless he asked me a direct question, then I would stare at my desk and answer. In good news, I turned 16 so I finally got a license and my parents bought me a black Lexus. No more bus for me! Unfortunately, this meant I had to take Jamie to school and pick her up. One Saturday morning I was planning on sleeping in but was interrupted when a wave of nausea so fierce actually woke me up and sent me sprinting to the bathroom and once again puking my guts out. For the next week, every morning I would have a fierce wave of nausea and then vomit. I was also finding that I was enjoying mom's strange meal concoctions more and more and my parents were delighted that I was eating a lot now. I loved her jelly pancakes and chocolate enchiladas but most of all I loved the blueberry waffles with peanut butter smothered pickles. What the hell is wrong with me? At lunch, I started piling a mountain of food on my tray and even Leslie was starting to notice. Another thing was that I started wearing tight tank tops in the place of bras because every time I attempted to put one on, it would hurt my breasts so bad. On one Tuesday evening, I was doing my homework, when I looked at the calendar posted above my desk. I had little sticky stars on today, yesterday, and for the rest of the week. And that's when I froze. Dread filled my system turning my body into 3 ton lead. The nausea...the puking....the weird food cravings....giant appetite....tender boobs.....missed period.....well...fucking shit.