Aftermath (An SVU Fanfiction) *EDITING*

Denial

"Pregnant? I can't be pregnant!", she thought to herself. "He never..you know..inside you. You wouldn't let him, remember?", and that's true. After she finally was able to have sex with Elliot again, she never once let him ejaculate inside of her and he respected her wishes. That man she was with..there's no way a pregnancy would be detected the day of. She can't be pregnant with Lewis' baby, obviously, I mean she went to the check-ups, took the medication she was advised to take and was never subjected to any pregnancy symptoms. "Or is it? No! No, Olivia, you are not pregnant!"

"Liv? Baby, talk to me.", Elliot tries. "Did you not hear me?"

"No. I'm not pregnant.", she rolled over in bed.

"Olivia, you are."

"No!", she yells. "Wait, 12 weeks? That means..no! You are not pregnant with Lewis' child! You are not having a rape baby!"

"A doctor is going to come up in about a half hour to get you an ultrasound, to make sure that everything is okay."

"I don't need an ultrasound because I'm not pregnant, okay?! I'm not! I did everything I was supposed to do to prevent that and it worked, so leave me alone!", she started crying and whispered "Just go away..", and Elliot did just that, respecting her wishes as he always does.

After thirty minutes, a nurse came up with the equipment for the ultrasound, shortly followed by Olivia's appointed OBGYN, for the time being. 

"Would you like to hear the heartbeat?"

"There is no heartbeat because there is no baby! But sure, knock yourself out.", Olivia snaps.

"Well, there is definitely a fetus in there. 12 weeks is a pretty accurate time of conception.", she tells her. Olivia rolls her eyes. "Do you hear that? That's the heartbeat. It's strong, the fetus is healthy!", the doctor cheers. 

"For the last fucking time, there is no fetus or baby or whatever you want to call the thing that isn't inside of me!", she pushes the doctor's hand away and wipes off the gel. Elliot puts a hand on her shoulder.

"Could you give us a minute?", he asks. The doctor nods and exits the room. "Liv, you've gotta calm down..or try to."

"I'm tired of everyone saying that I'm pregnant when I'm clearly not! I don't want to talk about this any longer and I want to go home!", she started crying "Please let me go home."

"As soon as your doctor clears you, I will."

"Screw the doctor! There is nothing wrong with me!"

"You tried to kill yourself! You think nothing's wrong with you, well there is! I know you, I know you and I know that the Olivia Benson I knew four months ago would've never even thought about this!"

"Well she's gone, okay?! Olivia Benson is gone and she's not coming back!", she sobs. "And I'm not pregnant! I'm not having a rape baby and I want to go home!"

*******

"I don't need to take those damn vitamins, okay?!", Olivia yelled for the third time.

"Take the fucking pills, Olivia! I'm done arguing with you! That baby deserves-"

"THERE IS NO BABY!", she screams. "There isn't any kind of baby inside of me, so shut up! Shut up about the whole so called 'pregnancy' and leave me alone!"

For the past two weeks, Olivia had still been reluctant to accepting her new fate as a mother. She fights with Elliot everyday about taking prenatal vitamins because there, quote, "is no baby".

"Then take it for shits and giggles, okay?", Elliot gives them to her and she took them.

"Happy?"

"Yes.", he said blankly. Elliot headed for the door. "I'm going to the store. Need anything while I'm out?"

"Cream cheese and some cookies..", she tells him angrily.

"Okay..", he sighs and leaves.

Olivia went to the bathroom and got undressed to take a bath. She looks in the mirror at her now 8 month baby bump that she blames on weight gain, as if she could get that big on her own, and still denies the possibility. 

"God, you need to lose weight!", Olivia tells herself out loud. She started the bath, something she should've done before anything else and then put a towel around her, which wouldn't go over her stomach, and sat on the edge of the bathtub. 

After her bath was prepared, she lowered herself in and washed herself clean, soaking in the hot water, and relaxing in the silence that fills the room. It was so peaceful. That is until little footsteps entered the room and hovered over the edge of the tub. 

"Livvie, can you fix this for me?", Eli asks her in the sweetest little voice, holding out a fire truck which detached ladder. Luckily, the bath tub is deep enough, and the water and soap rose high enough, that nothing came into the eight year old's view. "I was just playing with it and it just broke! It popped off!", he handed her the two pieces.

"This couldn't have waited until I was finished?", she jokes, taking the pieces from him. He shook his head. "Alright.", she snapped them together and gave it back to him. "Better?"

"Yeah! Thank you, mommy."

"You're welcome, sweetie."

Eli ran out and came back almost instantaneously with a few more toy cars and trucks, placing them on the ground. He then, with absolutely no shame, went over to the toilet, pulling down his pants, and sits down. 

"So..what are you doin'?", he asks.

"What are you doing?"

"Poopin'.", he sighs as if he's extremely exhausted. Olivia couldn't help but laugh. "I think it's a big one."

"You had to use this bathroom?"

"Uh..yeah!", he exclaims. Olivia's cell phone started ringing, luckily she had it sitting on the edge of the bathtub so she could check on her emails, and she answered it. 

"Hello?"

"Hello?"

"It's me."

"Obviously. What do you want, El?", she's still pissed at him and could care less about what he wants. "Well?"

"I was just telling you that I'm on my way home."

"I didn't need you to call me for that."

"Liv, I know you're mad, but it is what it is. You're preg-", she hung up the phone and rolled her eyes.

Eli was grunting loudly and was oblivious to where he was and who else was in the room. Suddenly, a sigh of relief escaped him. "My tummy feels better, momma!"

"Oh, yeah? How about you go get some of mommy's air freshener? You know, the one in the blue bottle, the febreeze?"

"The stuff you spray when daddy farts and it stinks really badly?"

"Yes, honey.", she chuckles. No matter how bad Olivia ever felt, that little boy always made it better. Always. "Now go before the bathroom gets stinky!"

"Okay, I'm going, I'm going!"

A/N

I always find that the Liv/Eli moments always make this story not seem as dark and sad.(: