The fallen angels

Eight

•Devin pov (finally!!)•

Deep down I wanted to forgive Alex , but I couldn't.

He "saved" me but I didn't want to be saved.

I mean yeah in a way he helped me out but still.

I just want to get away from this life

•Alex pov•

I just wanted Devin back.

I decided in that moment that I was going to the hospital and I was going to talk to Devin.

A real talk.

I just wanted her to want me back too.

I got into my truck and drove to the hospital , I turned up my music, Luke Bryan.

Yeah I know I'm a guy but Luke Bryan is an amazing country singer.

Devin liked him too.

I turned it up even more.

Trying to block out all thoughts and just drive.

I kept my eyes on the road.

I pulled into the hospital and just stared at the steering wheel.

I spaced out.

I checked my phone.

I was in that parking lot for already 10 minutes.

I asked myself, "what am I doing here?"

I couldn't find a reason to leave so I walked in.

My palms were sweaty and my heart was racing.

What if I was about to make a fool out of myself.

I ignored all of those thoughts and walked to the front desk.

I asked more than said "I'm here to see Devin."

The lady at the desk ,after trying some stuff into the computer, "um what is the last name sir?"

I thought a minute "Duckwitz, Devin Duckwitz."

"Mmmmm oh yes right here!"

She said "what is your relation sir?"

I thought a moment, "what are we?" I thought to myself.

"Boyfriend, I'm her boyfriend."

"I'm sorry sir, only relatives can see her. Due to her condition right now."

"Her condition?" I asked to myself.

"Ma'am I say this with all due respect, I need to see her and you will let me see her."

I stood with my arms crossed.

"Well I'm not supposed to let you but if I don't you're not going to leave, are you?" She replied.

"Nope" I said popping the "p".

"Well i will let it slide , but I'm going to need your name for the future."

"Alex, my name is Alex."

"Okay thank you Alex, your good to go, I have you in the system as someone who can pass so even if I'm not here you can get through."

"Thank you ma'am you don't even understand how much this means to me!"

She nodded and with that I walked away.

Only to remember that I didn't ask where she was.

I walked back "um excuse me but miss I didn't,"

And with that she knew what I was gonna say and she said with a smile "3rd floor, left wing, room 235."

"Thank you!"

I said as I ran away.

I got to the room, and I just stood there.

Blankly staring.

I finally reached for the knob.

But for some reason, I pulled away.

I finally pushed myself to open the door.

She was awake, but just stared back at me.

I finally spoke up.

"Devin I'm sorry but I can't lose you, I need you Devin, you're the only thing keeping me alive right now. Devin please forgive me I don't know what I did wrong!"

I said all of that but she still just stared.

I fell into a chair and gave up, I lost it.

I started crying right there.

I just fell apart.

The nurse quietly spoke, "I'll leave you two alone."

Devin still just stared blankly at me.

I don't know what happened, I just couldn't handle this.

I really just wanted her to want me as much as I wanted her.

I got up and walked to the bed that she layed in.

I grabbed her hand , "Devin please say something to me , please."

I still crying , her still staring.

"Alex please, not here." She said as she finally spoke.

"Then where?" I spat back.

All she did was look down into her lap.

I slowly walked away and grabbed the door handle.

I turned around and let a tear slip down my cheek.

Devin saw I knew she did.

I closed my eyes then slowly turned around again now facing the door.

I opened the door and slammed it shut.

I leaned against the wall next to the door and slid down the wall.

I sat there with my head in my hands, letting my tears fall.

After a short time, I got up and walked out of the hospital, with my head down.

I walked all the way to my truck with my head down.

I got in and just pounded on the wheel.

I let another tear fall and I slowly started my truck.

I didn't even know I had all of these tears to cry.

I drove all the way back home , but instead of being happy to be home after a two hour drive, I felt alone, almost lost even.

I went inside and sat down.

I just stared blankly at a wall.

I guess I was out of tears.

I sat there for a couple moments until sleep took over.

I fell asleep right there, in my living room, on the couch, alone.