This one is dedicated to my Noku. Noku is albanian word that means " honey " ...
Noku is my stupid online best friend. I met her on twitter a year ago.To be honest I don't remember how we met but I am glad we did. We even met each other in person.It was CRAZY.
My Noku...My noku cuts...I had my doubts cos' she was constantly posting gifs,photos,quotes about those who cut. I couldn't ask her in person,because I was pretty sure she'd say NO. But I asked her anonymously in ask.fm
"Do you cut? Have you ever cut? "
She said " ... Yes ... "
I couldn't help but cried when I read it.
I tweeted her to stop,made her to promise me she'd never cut anymore.
We had a long conversation. I asked her why does she cut.
It was a stupid reason...
She thinks she's not beautiful,she has no friends,she thinks everyone leaves her...and more stupid reasons.
The fuck is wrong with people?
I know telling her she was beautiful wouldn't help her.
I felt hopeless.
I know that when I told her I would always be her friend, didn't calm her down.
I know that when I told her I'd never leave her,still didn't make her think the opposite.
To be honest,even I have felt like this before,like no one cares,no one is there for me...but it doesn't last forever.
If someone appears in your life ...
" Hi I love you "
Everything changes.
You are not alone in this big world.
You just have to choose who you want to be with....no one is perfect...everyone's gonna hurt us.
After that long conversation,after those uncontrollably tears,we made a pinky promise.
It was really hard but finally convinced her.
I remember when she said " Don't worry, I don't cut in summer cos' I don't want them to see my scars...but I can't promise you when winter comes."
And I was like " The fuck is wrong with you? You don't have to stop because summer is coming.You have to stop because your family loves,needs you,you have to stop because life goes on,you have to stop because I'm asking you to stop and you know how much I LOVE YOU . You fucking think it's a game ? "
Oh my Gosh ! It was the saddest conversation ever.
I REALLY HOPE she doesn't break our pinky promise. I told her I'd unfollow her and never talk to her again if she posts those gifs,quotes,photos again. I promised her.
The next day,she posted those things again.
I unfollowed her and tweeted " The fuck is wrong with you? Will you delete them now or will you say goodbye to me forever...?"
She was like " I won't delete them,because It's a way I like to express my feelings,but I promise you I won't post again"
Didn't know what to do ... followed her again...and agreed.
I love her so much,you don't how much. She always tells me how much I mean to her,how much she loves me,how much I care about her...and more and more...
Actually this is my point. To help people,make them feel better,stop them from cutting,crying.
This is not the first time I have helped people from cutting and this WON'T be the last.
What I really hope is ... I have helped them and stopped them.
This is all I ask in my life.
I really want to make a change.
And I believe I can.
I will.
Just watch me.
Nokuuuuuuuu ♥ ♥ Te dua shumeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
-Angie.
- To everybody : If you ever need someone to talk I'm here to listen.
I promise.
message me here
or got to my youtube account .
Angie is here to listen :)
Much Love :)
Stay Strong :)
