If

If we were plants...

Life seems so hard that it gives you the idea of giving up. Life's challenge starts at the very beginning when you're trying to survive inside the elastic tissue of your mother's womb. Then, after several months, you are still blind to see the colors of the world but you can feel the warmth and the coldness, and hear the melodies surrounds the room. Weeks has past, colors started to enter your house of intellect through your bright eyes. And then, curved lips draws onto your face in the first sight of people that laid you in their arms. You had already succeeded in the first part of life.

Watching the plant grows into a beautiful flower, gives wander in the eyes of people around. Many of them wants to pick it up, but then, they are protected by the arms of the gardener. No gardener wants to have his plants wither then die. He always took most the time of the world to tend his plants. He waters them, gives humus to its soil, and most especially, give them enough sunlight the plants need. After all, a gardener could never be proud of his profession if he doesn't take care of his plants whole - heartedly.

In such a beautiful garden, there will always be wild grasses. Another life's challenge had appeared. The wild grasses will get as much water that has been given to you by the gardener as possible. But, what will you do? You can't move nor speak and tell those wild grasses to go away. Instead, they will stay as they grow their roots to the ground. You're only option is to have the gardener plucked them out. You've been saved just now, how lucky of you! Right now, you're a fully bloom flower. You can now make more people love staring at you.

On the other side, there's a lonely plant. She doesn't bear any bud of flower, and that was I. I never tried to show myself to anyone. I stayed in the corner where I could be barely notice by the gardener. I still talked to other plants but, most of the time, I'm just answering their questions. That only made the conversation's duration very short. I don't know how to approach people, I just wait for them to approach me. I'm happy being inside my pot covered with moss. The gardener has almost no time to look after me but every time he does, he just cut my withered leaves and tiny branches. After that he would tend at that beautiful flower.

I'm fine by myself. I don't have any complaints. The gardener is still watering my area, unconsciously giving me water. I can get sunlight if I bend a little forward, but I don't want to stay too long. Maybe that's how it made me weak. I don't care about myself, instead I care about the things that I want. I care about the things that I think I need but they were less. Seeing the flower being tend by the gardener, I felt envious. Why do I not have the same treatment as him? Do I came from a cheap seed? Or it all comes down to, the gardener has no interest of my existence?

So I just live everyday, thinking, why do such plant as I am still striving to survive? I get as much water I needed to survive the day. I tried my very best to bend every morning to get as much sunlight to restore my green. I hid behind the huge plants beside me to protect myself from the cold breeze at night. And everyday, I do these routine to survive, because maybe one day, the gardener will tend me next time. I really do envy the plant that has blooming flowers in front of me. I'm still so far away from becoming like him.

At night, where the moon shone so bright and stars twinkling in the vast dark sky, I always look up to them. And my thoughts wander around. I think of nothing else but you. Even the moonlight has shone on you. You are so beautiful! Dazzling even! There's no doubt many people will look upon you. Until then I realized, I was never envious of you. Instead, I fell in love of how you show beauty to this mysterious world. Yes, I do fell in love! I really hope that as days pass by, you will continue to show them.

I fell in love, which brings me to my downfall. It also made me realize that, I won't make it to place beside you. And, I notice a drop of water is falling out of me. I saw one of my leaves begun to dry. How pitiful I am? No one would notice except the ants that crawls beside me. All I can do is stare at you, the beautiful plant that I admire and keeps myself survive. And then I ask the stars, "What powers did this plant possess? That even me, who's blind to the world, fell in love with him. Do I really fell in love? Or is it infatuation? Or simply envy?" As I begun to dig deeper in my thoughts, it is becoming dark and darker. Then, I felt the night's breeze and closed my eyes for a moment. As it passed, I slowly opened my eyes. And there I see, some of your flower petals falls and goes with the wind. Even though, I knew for the moment that you also weren't made perfect. But then, you still shone with such beauty. I can clearly see how strong you are to be stable.

I may not as beautiful as you are, shine bright as you are, all I need is to be me. I continue to strive for my existence. Not only the purpose of getting notice and hope that the gardener would tend me but also to be notice by you. I still not know exactly why I needed your attention. Do we always need a reason to love someone? Do we need evidence or proof that we love someone? Sometimes we don't need these things, we just need to show them how we felt when we love them. Sometimes we just need love made its way to the other person's heart. If they felt the same, if you felt the same, there's no comparison on how blissfulness surrounds the world!

Yes, I am selfless! I know it's a bad thing but then... but then, I still have no reason why.