Unstable lovers

Chapter Twelve

We got to the beach at 2pm and decided to set up our tent outside the nearby woods, so that we would be away from the sea when the tide began to come in. It took us ages to build the tent because none of us knew how to do it, but we got there eventually.

When we had finished we moved all our duvets and sleeping things inside, before we decided we should collect wood for a fire.

We walked into the woods to find as much wood as we could. We all tried to stick together so that nobody would get lost, as it was a huge woods and we didn't really know our way around.

"Lilly, are you ok?" Michael asks.

I didn't want to tell him that I was feeling a little upset, because I knew it was down to my mental health and stuff, so I just nodded and looked away so that he wouldn't see my face. He can tell weather or not I'm ok, and I don't think I convinced him.

"Lilly, your mouths smiling, but your eyes aren't. What's wrong?" He says. Dropping the wood he had collected onto the floor and walking over to me.

"Michael I'm fine!" I snap as a tear begins to run down my cheek.

I can't help it when I get like this. I can be completely happy, and then the next moment a horrible darkness will take over me. All inch of happiness is drained away from me and then I begin to cry. It happens a lot because of my mental health issues, and Michael understands. So I shouldn't have snapped at him, he was just trying to help.

I burst into tears when I realised that I was now all by myself and I was lost. I had been walking for ages and I had no idea where I was. It was beginning to get dark, and all I wanted was a hug from my annoying big brother or from Daz or Luke. I collapsed onto the floor, landing on a sharp tree stump which cut deeply into my stomach. I looked down to see that I was covered in blood. The amount of blood terrified me, and I cried even more because it hurt really bad.

I suddenly became short of breath, and I felt myself starting to panic. I leant against a tree and dropped onto the floor. I couldn't breathe and I was gasping for breath, I was hurting, and worst of all, I was all alone with no one to help me.

I wanted someone to hold me tight and tell me it's all going to be ok, but I couldn't even shout for help. Because I was still unable to breathe properly. I began to feel dizzy from lack of breath and I felt so weak that I couldn't even raise my arm to wipe away the tears that were blocking my vision. I was so scared that I was going to die. And that these could be my last moments alive. All by myself in pain and with no one. All alone.

I don't want to die like this. I may have tried to kill myself a number of times. But I don't want it to end like this. My life just started getting better thanks to Luke, and I don't want it to end now.

My head dropped and everything began spinning around me. My heart was beating so fast and the tears were still poring down my face.

"LILLY.................LILLY..." I hear Darren's voice. He sounds like he's crying and his voice cracked while he yelled.

"LIIILLLLYYYYYY!!....... LILLY." I hear Luke yell moments later

"LILLY...... SPROUT!!!........ LILLLLLYYY PLEASE WHERE ARE YOU?..." I hear Michael. And his voice sounds so scared and upset that I begin to cry even more.

I try to shout out for help but I still can't breathe and all that happens is I begin to choke even more.

I see figures walking towards me. But everything is blurry so I can't tell who they are.

"Oh my god.....MICHAEL, LUKE, OVER HERE. I FOUND HER!" I hear Darren yell. And I feel myself being lifted into the air. Daz began to talk to me but I couldn't make out what he was saying I was drifting away.
Seconds later I hear Luke and Michaels worried voices.