Expect the Unexpected

Chapter 1.

You know those days were you rather stay in bed than go anywhere?
Wait Wait
Aren't those days everyday, blahhh. I Just wanted to stay in bed not let anyone bother me, minding my own damn business.
I was falling asleep thinking about a hot Zac Efron confessing his undying love for me.

"KIMMY GET YO STUPID FLITHY SQUAP ASS UP" David yells at me from the Kitchen.
I groaned and got out of bed.
I grab my phone and see I have two new messages from Ashley and Katie.

Katie was my hoe, my one and only and Ashley well uh she's just daddy if you know what I mean.
I'm mean noo not kinky daddy I mean like Dad like Daddy.
Get me?
I guess not.
"DAVID YOU LITTLE HOE DON'T YOU DARE WAKE UP KIMMY OR ELSE I'LL CHOP OFF YOUR WEE WEE" I open the door to see Steph my sister hitting David with a pickle. To be exact that pickle was very long...
Who the fuck hits people with a pickle? Oh Yeah Steph does.
Then there's Jamia, that little Devil of a neighbor we have one time, that little kid ran me over with those toy trucks you drive.
Like what the fish, There was a monkey on the loose driving a truck!!!
"uh Steph Pickles are for eating... not for raping David" I said raising my eyebrow at Steph.
She looks at me and then to David.
"You did not see this Kimmy, you didn't if you tell anyone you're dead" she glared at me.
"Ooh Fiesty, I like mine Fiesty" I smirk
David looks at Steph then laughs, "KIMMY" Steph yells, I Just smirk at her.
"DANTE DANTE DANTE STEPH WAS RAPING DAVID WITH A PICKLE OH MY G'S THE PICKLE WAS HUGE LIKE BIGGEST PICKLE I EVER SEEN IT WAS ABOUT 5 INCHES" I ran to my twin brother Dante's room before Steph and David catch up to me.
I enter Dante's room and lock it, I turned around to see Dante and there he was, looking ugly as always watching Hannah Montana.
"YOU GET THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS" Dante starts signing, he hasn't notice I was there looking as hot like always.
sike but I mean I'm here watching him.
I start to cough, my fake coughs gives you life.
Dante turns around and jumps "WTF KIMBERLY LIGON WHY ARE YOU IN MY ROOM" He yells
I move back and fourth like a little kid does and smile innocently, "uh so there was this fight and the fight had two sexy bitches undressing themselves, yeah it had that" I opened the door and ran out.
"KIMMY" David and Steph yell my name, I kept running until I slipped and bumped in to someone.
"AHHHHH WTFF ARE YOU", I yell
Holy Christmas nuts, there's a person at my house dressed like a bear.
I grab Dante and hide behind him, "There's a bear" I said pointing at the figure.
Dante rolls his eyes.
Bitch he did not just do that.
"get out you ugly bear!" David hides behind me.
Three some ewwww.
"What the fuck you mean bitch" the bear spoke up.
"THE BEAR TALKS DAVID HOLY ANGEL POOP IT TALKS" I shiver,
Dante and Steph justt stood quiet rolling their eyes at mine and David's nonsense.
This is why David and I get along than getting along with Steph and Dante, because both of them are mean. Those bitches eat pizza without me, it makes me cry. Pizza is my fuck buddy only mine.
"That's Jayla" Steph laughs.
I look at David and David looks at me.
Uh well that's Jayla Uh well... this is interesting.
"JAYLA BITCH WHY ARE YOU A BEAR" David panicks
"DAVID SHUTUP BEFORE THAT BITCH BEATS US UP" I open my mouth but too late, Jayla was already beating us up with an umbrella.
"Who's the bitch huh" Jayla asks while beating us up.
I groaned at the pain, Freaking Jayla not getting her Christmas present now, it's was a one inch Dildo but no she's beating me up.
"Oh baby I like rough" David winks at Jayla.
Bam She hits him harder, ew oh my. My poor innocent eyes.

"Jayla stop" Steph pushes Jayla off of us.
"No Stephie, they were making fun of my stripper outfit" She pouts.
Holy shit.
Jayla a stripper?
Best thing ever, I get free lap dances ayeeee.
Yus.
I get up and leave my room and change, after 10 minutes I get out of my room and see Katie, Ashley, Jose, Cass, and Eli.

"KIMMY BABE" Katie hugs me.
I hug her back and wave hi to the rest of the guys.
Tasha and Carina were in the U.K so they weren't here, so I was stuck with these ugly people.
I walk to the Kitchen and see Steph cooking.
She was making pancakes, "Awh you shouldn't have Steph" I say while looking at those delicious pancakes.
"Uh I didn't" she smiles
Oh Oh Oh what a fuck boy.
I give her a glare and stick my tounge out.
"BITCHES DON'T BE SAD THE QUEEN HAS ARRIVED " Ash smirks while entering the Kitchen followed by Jose and Cass and Katie.
"You ain't a queen, I am" Steph starts arguing with Ashley.
"nahhh uh, I am" Ashley says.
"Yeah huh, I'll shove my pickle at you" Steph argues.
"You wouldn't Dare" Ash Gasps.
"I will" Steph smirks.
"NOOOO THE PICKLE IS FOR DAVID" Jose yells.
"not anymore" I wink.

10 minutes later we were all on our way to school, Steph took her stupid Ferrari and made all of us walk with the devil Jamia.
Don't even ask how Steph got a Ferrari, she probably robbed a bank or fucked a sugar daddy.
I say she had sex with an old 80 year old.
Eww, that's kinky.
I'm pretty sure so did Tasha, she frickle frackles with everyone.
We were all walking to school minding our own business, until the little monkey spoke up.
"Side Dav you better give me my pink pinapple or I'll kill yo turtles" Jamia whinned.
"Don't you dare" David glared at her. Everyone stayed quiet and ignored both of them and walked to school.
We all walked in an awkward silence until Jose spoke up, "My Pee Pee is the size of a mini cucumber".
We all turned around and looked at him, he froze.
"Wait you have a dick man?" David asked him.
"Yes I do, wanna see?" Jose asked.
"No" we all screamed
Ew, imagine my poor innocent eyes.
I will need holy water probably also even Jesus.
"Shutup Cass you know you'll like it, you too Jamia and Kimmy" Jose Winked at us.
I gave him a disgusted face and wrinkled my nose.
"In your dreams Ayala" I rolled my eyes.
"In my dreams, you already like it" He said.
"EWW NO, Jamia likes it probably also Cass" I groaned.

"Jose sucks dick" Jayla said
"Jayla sucks" Jose Argued with Jayla.
"Jose blows" Jayla said making everyone laugh.
"Do not" Jose glared at everyone.
I laughed and walked ahead, catching up to Katie.
Katie was on her phone scrolling down her news feed, she hasn't notice I'm next to her.
She looked up and saw me, I smiled, "We're here" I say.
"Ew school" Dante Groaned
"First day of school sucks ass" David said
"You suck ass" Jamia told David.
"that bitch of Steph is already here" Ashley groaned
"Ew I'll get raped today at school" Jose pouted.
"shut up you hoes" Jayla groaned.

I groaned, "Welcome to Hell".

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BAMM FIRST CHAPTER BOOTY.
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