At some point in your life, you come to realize: there are things that matter and things that don't. It usually takes a while for this realization to set in. For Reba, that all important conclusion came at twenty nine years old. It was then that she realized that true love mattered more than the ring on her finger. She had loved her husband once, at the beginning of their life together. She had loved him tremendously. But things, and people, change. Charlie had become someone she couldn't love anymore. It was sad to say, but she knew their marriage had it seen it's better days, and now it was dying. Someone else held her attention. Someone more caring and attentive, who had heart... her heart.
***
Reba turned to face her bedroom wall, her back turned to Charlie. He had just finished one of his half-hearted attempts to bring the fire back and make her feel loved. When she couldn't stand listening to the rythym of breathing that she had once found so comforting anymore, she climbed out of bed. As she walked down the hallway and past the window, she heard a horse whinny in the pasture. It was a high lonesome sound. One that said "Here I am, where are you?" And it was exactly how she felt...
***
The next morning was a whirlwind. Her mother called to say that Susie had shown up in the middle of the night, beat beyond recognition yet again. Reba hated to see her sister suffer, but the woman simply lacked the bravery to leave her husband. Reba tried not to think too hard about the fact that she ought to leave her own as she prepared his breakfast.
"Oh baby," a booming voice filled the room. "That sure smells good. Matter of fact, the only thing better'n your steak and eggs is what you gave me last night." He winked at her as she supressed a shudder.
"Mhmm..." she handed him his plate.
"What are your plans for the day?" A face that she had once considered handsome, his questioning gaze only irked her now.
"Well, mama called this mornin' to tell me Susie is over there again, so I was fixin' to go see her."
"Did he hit her again?" Charlie asked quietly. Reba thanked her lucky starsthat the man didn't believe in THAT form of abuse.
"Mama said you can hardly recognize her for all the swelling." Reba looked down as she spoke.
***
Reba walked into the bedroom she had shared with her sister as a child.
"Susie?" The question was directed at a lump under the covers. The lump shifted, and Reba took in Susie's bruised and swollen face. "Oh honey..."
"It's fine, really. He just got a little upset." Susie cringed in pain as she spoke.
"It's not fine." Reba's eyes filled with tears as she spoke. "You have got to leave him."
"I can't."
"And just why not?"
"I'm pregnant again..." Susie whispered.
***
"Mama! What are we gonna do? He's gonna kill her. And that baby... I'm worried." Reba was pleading with her mother to involve the police.
"You think I'm not? That's my baby girl. That's my grandbaby. But she loves him. She would never forgive us for that."
Reba stared at her mother for a moment. "Mama, I'LL never forgive you if something happens to her."
***
"Reba?" She cringed at the sound of his voice.
"Yes, dear?"
Charlie walked into the kitchen. "Where the HELL have you been? I've been waiting an hour and a half for my damn dinner."
"Coming right up, SIR." She glared at him.
"I don't appreciate your tone, woman." And then he spit a stream of tabacco juice on her kitchen floor.
***
Reba was sitting outside the Atoka county courthouse, trying to work up the strength to go in and file for divorce. Twenty minutes later she drove away, nothing accomplished.
***
Reba was laying in bed, trying to persuade her husband to leave her alone.
"I go on tour tomorrow. I'm already tired and I need to get my beauty sleep."
He frowned. "We won't get any alone time for weeks. Don't you wanna give me a proper goodbye?"
"Charlie... you and I both know that neither of us is really into this. Let me go to sleep." She rolled away from him.
"Look, we don't have to make love. I just wanna get some sex before you leave." Reba continued to ignore him. "Fine, I'll get it somewhere else."
Reba gasped and rolled back to face him. "Go sleep on the couch, you son of a bitch."
***
Standing outside her tour bus the next morning, she smiled at the approaching figure. "Narvel." She touched his arm lightly.
"Reba, hello." He smiled down at her.
"Did you and Lisa enjoy the time you had at home?"
"Not exactly. I'm glad to be taking off with you... and the gang again."
***
Reba and Narvel sat at the small table of the bus's kitchen, playing blackjack. "Twenty-one!" Reba screamed, giggling. She was suddenly aware that Narvel was staring at her. She leaned forward slightly. "Narvel?"
"Reba..." he whispered. Then it happened. She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his.
***
Reba sat in her dressing room, staring in the mirror. She was married to Charlie, and last night she had kissed another man. Hearing a knock, she opened the door and let the sight of Narve take her breath away.
"Reba, about last night..." All she could think about while he was speaking was how soft and warm his lips were. Before she knew it, she was kissing him again. She felt his fingers dig inot her waist as he pulled her closer fiercely. Suddenly Reba realized that before this moment, she had never experienced true desire.
***
