Ellen (Miss Saigon Fanfiction)

Part 2

- [Start Flashback]-

"Ellen, can I tell you something?" Chris approached me, looking nervous. I just nodded my head at him. "Well, you know I was a soldier, right? I've been through war...and just before the Vietnam War ended, I met...this girl." I sighed, expecting this. We've been married two years and in all his nightmares he shouted something like a name. "Her name is Kim. I met her in a bar." My eyes widened as he said that. He went to bars? How many girls has he slept with? Noticing my look, he continued.

"It's not what you think, okay? I was there because of John."

"It's true, Ellen. He didn't want to come but I insisted him." John said, putting a hand on Chris's shoulder.

"It was her first day working in the bar and she didn't know how to act...uhm, like the other girls. I was captivated by her innocence...and John, noticing that I was hooked to Kim... uh, he, uhm..." he stuttered. I raised an eyebrow. Is it really that bad for him to have trouble explaining?

"Spit it out, Chris." I told him.

"He bought her for me and so we slept together...but!" He said hurriedly as he noticed me giving him another look. "That was just that. I lived with her two weeks and the night Saigon fell, I didn't get to take her with me." As he said the last part, I noticed his expression dim. "And, she has a son. I'm the father."

I'm in mixed emotions about this. Chris has a child. He has a responsibility to the child and to the girl...to Kim. And that gave me a question. One single question I needed to get the answer.

"Did you love her?"

"Huh?" I can see confusion and panic in his face. Once again I repeated the question.

"Did you love her? Am I just a rebound girl?" I asked as I felt my eyes water.

"Honestly, yes, I did love her. But now I have you." He approached me but I moved away. "Do you have a picture of her? I want to see what she looks like."

"Yes, I do." He showed me a picture taken in 1975. There were a lot of people, but in the centre were Chris and...the girl. Kim. They were smiling, and the girl was wearing some sort of Vietnam clothing and she had some sort of tiara and veil on her head. As I studied Chris, I saw that he was wearing his soldier's uniform with that radiant smile on his face. A smile I never saw in our two years.

"That was our wedding. We had a ceremony with some friends. But that was three years ago."

My insides boiled with rage. Even if he doesn't say it, I know I'm just a rebound. Before anyone could take hold of what was happening, I ripped up the picture and threw it to the ground.

"Ellen! F*ck! What did you do?!" I can see that he was indeed angry and as he came near me, I felt afraid. He held my arms tightly, so tight that it hurts. "Why the f*ck did you rip it?!" He didn't wait for my reply and he gave me a rough shove and went back to the picture. He was holding the three pieces and I can see deep sadness wash over him. He started to sob like a lost boy and I slowly made my way towards him and when I neared, I bravely put my arms around him.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry..." Chris repeatedly said in between his sobs. "Shhhh... it's okay. I'm sorry, Chris." I told him as he continued to rock back and forth while cradling the pieces of the picture. "I'm sorry..." Just then, I realized that he wasn't saying sorry to me. He was saying sorry to Kim. The girl he loved and he still loves.

- [End Flashback]-

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