Good Morning, Dirt. <A Ross x Barney fanfic of Fluffiness>

. . .

Ross was sleeping peacefully beside Barney. The Turkish dinosaur was hung-over, head pounding from Adam's birthday party. The only remedy for him was a long, cold shower.

Groggily, he hauled himself up- careful not to wake up Ross- and made his way to the bathroom. He managed barely to get himself undressed in his probably disgusting clothes, get in the shower and turn on the water the wrong way, making it freezing.

Barney let the cold water run over his shoulders, running over what happened last night in his head. Hmm... I noticed Adam and Jin in the kitchen, getting a little friendly. I wonder if they ended up in my... Predicament.

He had never meant to end up in bed with Ross, that was never the plan. But Ross had approached Barney, and while he was drunk, there was not much you couldn't get Barney to not do.

Barney recalls the one time that Jin had convinced Barney to walk up to a cop and hug him while drunk. He had ended up crying on the cop's shoulder for no apparent reason, and had to be rescued by three equally drunk friends.

Barney exited the shower now, and paused for a moment to look in the mirror. What he found was a little bit of... Lip gloss, that hadn't quite washed off. Granted, he was really just standing there for ten minutes, but still.

Does Ross wear lip gloss? Barney mused, pulling his cotton tee over his head. He then decided to go make a cup of coffee.

Down in the kitchen, Barney spotted Jin already on the coffee machine.

"Morning Barney," Jin greeted tiredly.

"Mornings Jin. Sleeps well?" He responded, a little cheekily.

Jin blushed slightly. "Well enough. For the two or three hours I even got."

Barney chuckled. "Yeah, Adam's a bit, ehh, crazy."

Jin continued talking, but Barney had gotten caught up in la-la land. Is Ross a bit crazy in bed? He tried to recall from last night. It was hazy, sweaty... Barney did remember kissing Ross, several times probably.

"... Hell-oooo? Earth to Barney, bong-bong-shickalurr?" Jin snapped his fingers, startling Barney up.

"Ah. Sorry Jin, just thinkings..." He trailed off again.

"Oh dear. A dangerous task for you, mate. Anyways, coffee-machine is free to use. Man, is Adam's house big..." Jin mumbles as he fades off into the early-morning shadows, coffee and all.

Barney throws the plastic cup thing into Adam's Tassimo and waits. Slowly, bits and pieces of the night before float into his mind.

He was downing his fourth- fifth? He was too drunk to care. Out of no-where it seemed, Ross, the sly little narwhal, was in front of him with a devilish smirk on his face.

"Hey Barney... Up for a bit of fun tonight?" Ross purred, draping himself onto Barney's shoulder.

Cautiously, he nudged his drunk friend off.

"Erm, maybe nots tonight Rot?... I's maybe had too much to drinks."

"Come on, Barney. It'll be fun! A bit of excitement at a dreary party?"

Hesitantly, the equally drunk man agreed and was subsequently dragged to a vacant bedroom. In an instant, Ross was about as humanly close to Barney as he could be without being a part of him, like a Siamese twin.

Barney felt awkward, but gave in eventually to Ross trailing kisses along his cheek and neck. It was weird, to say the least. He had considered himself mostly straight up until then, but Ross seemed determined to change his friend's perspective.

Barney turned his head suddenly on his friend, barely catching Ross's cheek with his lips. Ross turns his head towards Barney's, and presses their lips together in an unsure, but definitely heavy kiss.

They find a good arrangement, and then Ross's hands find their way under the cotton tee Barney wore for comfortability. The Turk pulled back slightly, unsure of exactly what was happening, but Ross's gentle touch guided him closer.

The coffee had been sitting there, untouched as Barney got carried away in thought. His face reddened as he thought on to what happened shortly after, before he realized that there was coffee to be drinking, and said coffee was not being drank.

He sipped the steaming liquid, familiar bitterness a comfort to the pounding headache and still-tired eyes Barney was sporting. The coffee helped wake his senses up, allowing him to deem it an appropriate time to return to a shirtless, hungover and sleepy Ross.

Ross was just waking up as Barney entered, a bleary look emerging from a tired face. He settled in beside his friend, possibly lover, with a small and affectionate "Morning, you dirt."

Ross smiled pathetically up at him, reaching up as if he were pulling Barney down for a kiss. At the last minute though, he stole the coffee right out of the Turk's large paws and took a long sip.

"Ahhh... Morning." He responded cheerfully after swallowing the hot liquid.

Barney rolled his eyes, gently taking the coffee back and putting it beside him on the nightstand. He then lay down beside Ross, whom snuggled up into his side with a pleased sigh. An arm draped over the American's shoulder, holding him tight.

Hands down, they both think, best way to wake up.

___
AUTHOR TIME
Hello people who have actually read my story, which is bizarre. Why come along and read this?
Anywhom, this was written at one or two in the morning while listening to 'I've got a jar of dirt' on ten-hour loop after playing Skyrim all day. There's gonna be a mistake or two, even if I DID come along and edit this.

EDIIIIT
So I fixed it, it doesn't sound like I was shipping the people now~