Aftermath [winter soldier//Bucky Barnes AU]

Chapter Twelve

SARAH'S POV

The plane ride back felt much longer than the ride there, for several reasons; one, Wanda's appearance would not leave my mind; two, Clint was teetering on the line of critical condition and we had no doctors on board; and three, Bucky knew there was something up with me.

Although Bucky didn't say anything back in Sokovia, I saw the look he gave me after I told him that nothing was wrong. He knew that I had seen something behind Tony when he came crashing through the castle doors yet he had chosen to not say anything.

The buildup was almost worse than him just coming out and telling me that he knew I was up to something. And, honestly, after I hid an entire pregnancy from him, you'd think that he'd be pissed that I was once again hiding something from him. Instead, he was being passive aggressively silent, which is much worse.

Bucky issues aside, Clint was slipping in and out of consciousness at an alarming rate that surely wasn't healthy for his brain. Although Nat had immediately staunched the blood flow upon finding him, he had since bled through several bandages and the blood loss would soon reach a critical level. Doctors had already been contacted and sent to Stark Tower, but with the length of time we still had left before we would arrive, I worried we wouldn't get there fast enough.

So I stared out of the window, watching as we blasted by thousands of miles of land and sea. The whole team was silent- unspoken words and similar images of pain flew between us, no words needed  to express the toll fighting takes on us. It was like this after most battles. But usually the silence didn't drive me insane.

And I think that the silence was especially bothering me today because there were so many things to worry about. I had a family to stress over, a teammate who may die any second now just a few feet from me, a lover who knew something was up but chose to dwell in stubbornness rather than speak to me, and of course the always present fear of danger. Although the team was silent, my mind was screaming.

An hour later, we finally touched down on Stark's landing platform. Clint was rushed off the second the plane wheels hit the tarmac, and the rest of us followed a little slower than usual. Tony carried the scepter carefully to his lab with the help of Banner and suddenly almost everyone was gone from the penthouse living area in under a minute.

I had just begun to take a deep breath and collapse on the couch when Pepper came into the room, cradling Calypso in her arms. I shot up, revitalized at the sight of my child, and practically sprinted to her. Bucky reached her a split second before me and gently took her from Pepper's arms, holding Calypso steady with his metal arm.

Leaning forward, he offered her his finger, which she grasped onto happily with a gurgled sound of delight. My lips curled into a smile and I wrapped my arms around both of them, happy to have a family to call my own. Bucky's problem with me seemed to be momentarily forgotten as we simply enjoyed each other's company.

Soon we gravitated towards the kitchen, helping Pepper prepare a meal for everyone. Heaps of food where cooked and placed on the enormous dining table for all of the scientists and agents currently taking up residence in Stark Tower. As soon as everything was ready, we left to go check on Clint.

We walked into the lab, where Clint was lying under a machine. Doctors swarmed around him. Tony was on the other side of the room looking through papers, and he nodded at us as we came in. He had a mischievous glint in his eye and I knew he was thinking about something funny when he opened his mouth.

"Has anyone checked the trashcan for Clint?" Tony called loudly across the room, earning a snicker from Natasha, me and Bucky. Clint, who was now wide awake, groaned.

"Tony, if I didn't feel like death right now, I'd come over there and kick your ass," Clint called, a laugh evident in his voice.

I continued towards the large machine and stopped in front of Clint, looking down at his tired yet humorous expression.

"Hey there, trooper. I thought we lost you for a second," I said, a smile on my face but a serious tone underlying my words. He sighed deeply and I glanced over at his abdomen, where the wound had been. The machine he was laying under was using lasers to create artificial tissue where his real tissue had been torn- and I had to admit it was insane to watch it work.

"You guys couldn't rid of me if you tried," Clint joked, and I smiled, lightly punching his shoulder. I would've really missed this loser if he hadn't made it today.

Bucky and Nat both brushed by me and I got out of their way, allowing them to talk to Clint. I headed towards Tony and Bruce, who despite their best efforts, were terrible at trying to be sneaky. They stopped talking when I got in earshot but I heard the word Ultron and it peaked my interest.

"Ultron?" I questioned, and I could almost see Tony's eye twitch as he realized that he apparently wasn't quiet enough. I crossed my arms in amusement.

"Stark. You're not sneaky."

"I am very sneaky when I want to be. You just have freaky hearing," he muttered, looking down at the papers in his hands again. I could make out a drawing of Loki's scepter on a sheet of notebook paper.

"Besides the point. Are you still going to go for this world defense system thing?" I asked, leaning over to take a peak at what was in his hand. I couldn't understand a lot of what he had written, but it looked like he was seriously considering this.

"We're working on it. I'm not sure if we can actually build this thing yet because we need to find a way to create robots who can think in a way similar to how human brains fire neurons, but Loki's scepter may be the key to that," he explained hurriedly, writing things down as he spoke to me. He was a haphazard and slightly crazy guy, who excelled at multitasking.

"Isn't artificial intelligence highly controversial because of the whole they-could-take-over-the-planet thing?" I asked, and both of them nodded.

"That's what makes this so hard. If we miss one tiny step, we open the door to god knows what," Bruce murmured, and a bad feeling resonated in my stomach. Artificial intelligence opens the door to a multitude of moral and ethical issues, and the implications it could have for the future are impossible to measure.

I had a very, very bad feeling about this.

--

A.N.

alright I have a huge problem.

I have lost my motivation for writing this story, and that makes me really upset, because I used to live for it. I think I have lost my motivation because I am writing a storyline that has already been written for me- and that makes it boring for not only me, but also the readers, because we already know what happens.

I also have no time at all to write. I'm taking AP classes, and I have two SAT's and a multitude of other exams coming up. I could find time if I was really motivated, but as I've said- I cannot seem to find it in me.

I think I am going to end this story soon. I will of course end it as smoothly as I can, and write something that everyone can appreciate. Or maybe I will go back and change everything to make it a better ending. I don't know anymore. Please please please tell me if you have any ideas as to what I should do.

Another note- I will be going back and editing the entire series. I have already begun editing Winter's Redemption. So if you would like to reread this series, come back in a few months and it will be better than you remember :)

Thank you so, so much for keeping up with me this whole time. I deeply apologize for letting everyone down by not continuing with this in the way I was going to.

-Jordan