We're both on Cloud Nine- Zayn Malik Fan Fic

4: Breaking down Walls

~Rydell's POV~

When someone looses a person to death it is said that there are 5 stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. When Drew died it wasn't easy accepting the fact that my only brother had died. I didn't want to believe it, but eventually I did. After the death of my parents I was in denial for two months. When I got onto the anger stage I drowned myself in it. I drowned myself in anger and I felt that the only way I would ease it was through drugs and alcohol. Since then I've been that way. I didn't allow anyone to see me cry because it showed a sign of weakness. I didn't allow myself to open up to anyone because they would laugh at me. People called me broken. When I locked my emotions up I discovered the party world. I discovered what it was to have one night stands, getting high, hangovers, everything that a teenager would do for fun, I would do to ease the pain. When you constantly do things to ease pain or stress it becomes addicting and a part of your daily life. I had grown accustomed to alcohol, drugs and the feeling of emptiness. I hid the little vulnerable girl. In reality I forgot about her but the coming back of Zayn brought her back out. Maybe it was because he comforted me the day my parents died. Maybe it was because he was the last person to see that frighten, little girl, or maybe it was the fact that he somehow found a way to climb over the tall wall that stood around me.

Ever since the kiss I had been avoiding him. I would walk out of the room when he would walk in. I would never walk out of my room unless it was to eat or take a walk to the park. I didn't allow him near me. The more he tried getting me to open up to him the more I blocked him, but after trying for an entire week he finally stopped. When he did it felt different.Almost as if I wanted him to come after me, to chase me and try breaking down my barriers.

It's almost been two weeks since the kiss and I haven't talked to Zayn. He would only keep a high radar to make sure I wouldn't sneak out which I had already done. Brett called me today around nine wondering if I wanted to go to the tattoo parlor with him. I gracefully accepted and pulled on a loose fitting burgundy jumper on along with black high wasted shorts. I placed a dream catcher necklace around my neck. I combed my hair back into a high ponytail and braided my bangs back as well. After finishing my make up I grabbed my Tom's desert botas and bag and snuck out the back door. Once I was out in the driveway Brett pulled up.

"Why are you barefoot?" he asked as I pulled my seat belt on.

"I didn't want to make noise sneaking past the troll" I said referring to the new nickname I gave Zayn.

Brett chuckled and said "You're so cute"

"Shush it" I said pulling on my shoes.

~

"All done" Tom, the tattoo artist, said placing a tattoo bandage on my lower neck. I had gotten a tattoo in cursive that said "Carpe Diem" which means to make the most of the present. In other words to live life to the fullest.

"Okay leave this bandage on for about twenty four hours. Once you're about to take the bandage off wet it a bit with lukewarm water so it won't hurt as much. Wash it with antibacterial soap and with your hands remove and little tiny scraps of blood. Let it air dry for about ten minutes and rub on this ointment, but just enough to where the tattoo looks shiny. Apply it twice a day for three days. After that you can apply regular lotion. There may be some peeling from the tattoo but don't pull it off or the ink may come out. Oh, and when you're drying yourself pat don't rub. Other than that you should be good to go!" Tom said with a smile handing me the ointment.

He walked out of the little curtain that separated us from the rest of the room. I carefully pulled on my jumper back on and walked over to where Brett currently had another tattoo artist, Jo, concentrated on his left shoulder.