Aftermath (An SVU Fanfiction) *EDITING*

Acceptance

Elliot and Olivia had been arguing all night over the fact that Olivia is pregnant. Olivia, in the far back of her head, knew that she was, but was too scared to admit it. She doesn't want to be pregnant, and she doesn't want the hormones and urges that come with it. She's carrying her rapist's baby and all she can think about is screwing her husband, the man that cheated on her, the man she cheated on. What the hell is wrong with her?

"Can you just shut the hell up about the damn baby?!" Olivia yells, almost in tears. "I'm pregnant, okay?! I'm pregnant and I don't want to be, so it'd be really nice if you'd just stop talking about it!"

Elliot held her hands in his and rubbed his thumbs over her knuckles. "Liv..you know that I love you..and this baby, no matter where it came from."

"You don't mean that."

"Yes I do, Liv. This baby, it's ours. That bastard hurt you," he explains as Olivia started crying. "he took something away from you and I will never be able to change that, no matter how much I want to."

"Is this your attempt at a pep talk?"

"Babe, I know that you're mad at me, hell, I'm mad at me, but you've gotta start talking to me," he tucks Olivia's hair behind her ear. She started crying and hugged him tight. Elliot held her head against his chest and rubbed her back as she cried. "It's okay. I won't ever let anyone hurt you again."

Olivia nodded. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" he lets her go and holds her shoulders.

"For..for cheating on you."

"Olivia.." he isn't sure what to say next, so there was a long pause before he finished his sentence. "look, why don't we just forget that ever happened, okay? I-I'm upset, obviously, but that's not my main concern. You and Eli..and this baby," he cautiously touches her stomach. "That is all I'm worried about."

"But Lewis-"

"Lewis is dead. He will never be able to hurt anyone every again, baby," Elliot wiped her tears away. Olivia sniffled and then cupped Elliot's face in her hands. 

"El..I-I love you so much!"

"I love you, too, babe. I love you, too."

Olivia's eyes drifted from Elliot's eyes to his lips and back up again. She kissed him deeply, moaning into his mouth. "Please."

"Liv.."

"Please, El. Please, I need this, we need this!" she begs. Olivia kisses him again and starts unbuttoning his belt and pants.

"Liv, take this slow."

"I don't need to. I-I miss you, I need you!" she pleads, continuing her task.

Olivia snakes her arm around Elliot's neck and kisses him once more. She moans softly. She's been aching for him for the longest time, her husband, the man she married, and she shouldn't have to beg. She should just be able to say the word and he's ready, and vise versa, like it used to be. Like they used to be.

Then, the baby kicked, ruining her mood, not that Eliot was entirely interested in her in the first place. She pushed him away from her. He fixed his pants and wiped the imaginary sweat from his forehead. Olivia put a hand on her stomach.

"I-I should get some sleep.." Olivia says softly. She quickly goes into their bedroom and lays down in bed, burying herself beneath the blankets.

*******

Elliot just got back from dropping off Eli at school. The eight year old was not pleased with his father doing so. He was pretty pissed off, actually. He begged Olivia to take him, but she wasn't feeling all that great. All he wanted was some bonding time with his mommy. 

Olivia was in the bathroom brushing her teeth. She just got out of the shower and had her hair wrapped in the towel. She wasn't expecting Elliot to be home so soon or she most definitely would've covered herself up. 

He came in, not knocking or even asking permission, to use the toilet. He stood there, peeing, and looked over at his wife, who was so gorgeous, even if a monster is responsible for it, he loved it. The part about her being gorgeous, of course.

He zips up his pants and washes his hands, drying his hands and then handing her the towel to do the same. He wiped off a bit of toothpaste from the corner of her mouth and rested his hands on her waist. Reluctantly, she let him. She didn't move, she didn't object, she just stood there, naked.

"Babe? Talk to me," Elliot tries. Olivia sighs and covers his hands with hers. She's pretty uncomfortable with him seeing her naked, but he's seen her naked multiple times.

"But you weren't pregnant," she thought to herself. "About what?"

"Hey, don't cry, babe," he cups the side of her face. "I just want you to feel like you can tell me things, no matter what they are."

"I just..I'm scared, and I'm emotional, and I really wanna have sex with you all the time, but I can't because we're supposed to mad at each other and-"

"We don't have to be mad at each other. I'm not mad anymore, okay? I stopped being mad a while ago."

"You did?'

He hesitates, he's telling a white lie, but it'll make her feel better. That's his goal: to keep her happy. "Yes."

Forgetting that she's completely naked, she wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him. "I love you, El."

"I love you," Elliot tells her, kissing her sweet lips and smiling at her smile that he loves see upon her beautiful face.

Olivia got dressed in a pair of light gray shorts and an over sized black t-shirt. She laid on the couch to watch some t.v.

"Babe, I gotta go in. We got a vic-"

"It's okay. You don't have to explain, remember?" she says, referring to the fact that she, too, is a detective. Elliot leans down and kisses her forehead. "Just call me on your way home, okay?"

"I will. Don't forget to pick up Eli."

"I won't," she pulled out her phone to set a reminder for herself so she wouldn't forget. She has yet to do so, but today wasn't going to be that day. "See you later."

Elliot walked out the door and for the first time, Olivia didn't feel entirely lonely when he did it.