In Search

Prologue Part I

     "Mama"
  "Yes, my dear?"
      "Well...," the small girl hesitantly began. Her brown eyes wandered around the room, as if she was searching for something to help gather her thoughts together. She sighed, "Why did God send Jesus to Earth if he knew he was gonna die?"
       The young mother looked at her daughter in surprise. She was just telling her daughter about Adam and Eve and how the world first began. She usually told her daughter bible stories at night to get her to sleep. She had not expected her daughter to ask her that question. However, she shouldn't have been surprised. Her daughter's ability to comprehend was astounding. At the young age of seven, her daughter loved to debate and learn about topics that most adults considered controversial.
    "Why do you ask, honey?"
    "Because...I just want to know."
   "Well, my dear. The bible says that it was done so we would be forgiven of our sins and that we may have eternal life."
      The young girl looked down with confusion on her face, "Mama, are there any sins that can't be forgiven?"
   The mother, not catching on to where her daughter was going with this, looked at her in deep thought. "Yes, there is one. Blasphemy against the Holy Spirit is the one sin that cannot be forgiven. It is when you curse the Holy Spirit or speak out against it willfully and diliberately. It is the one sin that can't and won't be forgiven. Why do you ask this?" The mother asked her daughter gently.
       "Mama, is God mean?" The young girl looked as if she was about to cry.
       "Honey, calm down. Just tell me what you are trying to ask. Take your time, there is no need to work yourself to tears. Now, dry them up before I start crying!"
    The girl wiped her eyes with her blanket. She slowed her breathing back to normal and looked back up at her mother. For some reason, her chest began to hurt from all of the thoughts in her head.
    "Well... God pushed Lucifer from Heaven, right? Because Lucifer wanted to be like him. But, but later on Jesus came and died for us so all of our sins could be forgiven. Why did God not give Lucifer another chance? I know thou shalt not covet, but that sin can be forgiven. People do it all the time. They want what isn't theirs so that must mean that God is bad and unfair, right? Lucifer just wanted to be like him."
       By this time, the mother's eyes were so wide. She had no idea what to say. She took a deep breath wondering how on earth her daughter's mind didn't explode from thinking these kind of thoughts. This was the biggest her daughter had ever thrown at her!
   She inhaled twice more before beginning. "I don't know. There is no way of knowing why God did what he did because no one knows how he thinks. And we also don't know the circumstances back then, but God loved Lucifer very much and maybe he felt hurt and betrayed. I have no idea. But, I do want you to know this! A person cannot be judged based off one thing." The mother thought for a minute, "If I did one good thing in my entire life and everything else I had done was bad, would you still love me?"
    The young girl answered quickly without a second thought.
    "Yes, you're my mommy."
"Does that make you bad?" The mother asked her daughter.
     "No," her daughter answered unsure.
    "I'm not gonna ask you why not, right now. You'll figure that out on your own a little later in your life, but everything can't be judged at first glance. Good people do bad things, and bad people can do good things. With that being said, how do you decide if a person is good or bad? What is good and bad? I'm still learning for myself, but each person must find answers to questions like these on their own, as you will have to one day. You must always remember, my dear, to think and believe in what you are thinking. If you don't trust your feelings then you know something is wrong. Honey, I honestly don't know why or how God did many of the things he did, but I believe that sometimes in order to do good you have to do bad also. But I know that God is good, my dear,
because he put you in my life." The mother finished and saw that her daughter no longer looked confused or sad but could tell she was still thinking. Well, she never stops doing that, she thought to herself.
     After a little while, the little girl looked up at her mother, "Okay, I think I understand now." The little girl then promptly fell asleep.
There is no telling what her dreams are like, her mother thought with a soft smile and shake of her head.