Leaving the New and Different You

Prologue

Prologue

Rochester, New York. 11 months ago.

Running through the hallway, I'm panting so hard. I can feel each person's eyes looking at me. All I can feel is pain, infidelity, and suffering. I wanted to cry so hard when I arrived home. Tell dad what Steve had done. How could he have done this to me? That jerk is a liar! I'm so stupid to be in love with him, to be his girlfriend! Seeing him kissing my best friend? They're traitors.

"Hey Av! Hold up!"

I had to keep running. What if he catches me? What would I say? How would I react to him? Is it better if I slap him on the face?

"Please stop! Let me explain!" Steve shouted, catching more attention. I didn't respond. When I already grabbed the door's handle, he caught my right arm. I hold back myself from looking at him. He said, "Av, you've got to listen. Please." Putting his forehead into mine, "You don't understand--"

I pulled away, "There's nothing I couldn't understand! I saw it with my own eyes! You lied! You lied!"

Hitting him on his chest is the best thing I can do. I lost my strength. I'm too tired to tell him how much I hate him now. He clasped my wrists, which stopped me from hitting him. I can't stop myself from crying. Tears rolled down my cheeks, but I wasn't supposed to cry, "Don't touch me!" I ordered him fearlessly. He backed up and looked into my eyes, still holding my wrists, "Can't you hear me? Don't touch me!" I repeated. I was trying to free my hands from his tight clasp when he spoke, "Just let me explain."

"I don't need your explanation! Just shut that mouth of yours! I don't want to hear your voice! I don't want you to get near me! Understand?"

"Av, I--"

"I don't want you anymore!" His hands loosened its clasp, "Sorry, Av--"

"Did I just told you to shut up?" I asked furiously. He released my wrists. "You've hurt me, Steve. What did I do wrong for you to find another girl? Am I not good enough for you? Now I see, I'm so proud of my heart. It's been played, stabbed, cheated, and now, broken by you! But somehow, it still works. You have never kissed me once. You have never gave me something. I'm so foolish. If you only knew how much," I pointed my finger to the position of my heart,"this thing hurts!"

He look away and at the same time, I turned around. All I can do now is flee. I pulled the door and I ran as fast as I could.

I don't know if I surely saw him crying before I turned around, but it's the best I can do to forget those things that happened lately. I should be happy because I made him cry. But crying won't heal these broken parts of my heart. He can't bring it back together again, me neither. It's going to be like this, such a mess. I just want a hug. A tight hug.

When I arrived home, I slowly knocked the door. And there I was, standing on the porch, waiting for someone to open the door. I looked down. I'm so upset to see that I was barefoot. My dress was also ripped. I didn't even notice that I was walking like a beggar just now. Disgraceful.

When the door creaked open, I quickly hugged my dad, "Av, what's the problem?" I didn't answer, still continuing being a crybaby to my father. I faced my dad, showing my ugly, wet face. Removing a few strands of hair away from my face, dad kissed my forehead. "Don't cry, Av. I know it's going to be alright."

I closed my eyes.