Drinking Numb (The Numbing Series #1)

Chapter Nine

<"The Pure and Simple Truth is Rarely Pure and Never Simple.">
•RUE•
•October 26, 2015•

Kohl saved me.
My tears run dry quickly, I feel a part of me turn off. Everything is so overwhelming, I've turned numb.
It's really not that big of a deal, I tell myself.
I wipe my face and untangle his arms from around me. I grab for my bag, my safety net, and pull it onto my back standing up.

"Rue?" Kohl asks concerned.

"I'm fine," I mumble. Kohl puts his hand on my arm as if he doesn't believe me. I jerk myself away from him. "I'm fine! It happened three freaking months ago!"

"It doesn't change the fact that it happened, and you just found out." Again, he tries to comfort me, reaching for my arm.
I slap it away.

"And whose fault is that?! You made me think I tried to kill myself for three months!" Again with the reaching. Again with the slapping. I push and push and push, and he gets closer and closer and closer. "Get away, get away from me! Why do you keep coming back?! Just leave me alone!"

Tired of my pushing, he grabs my wrists in both of his hands, pulling me close to him. "I'm not the one who keeps pushing the other away. All I want to do is be here for you. Why won't you let me?"

"Because your jobs done, okay?! You saved me, great! You took me to the hospital, great! You finally told me the truth, fucking great, but now you don't owe me anything! I don't need to be saved! I can handle myself, so go! Go away! I'm sure you have better things to do!" I am practically spitting this at him. I know he doesn't deserve it, but I can't help it. I just need to be on my own again.

"Is that it? You think I'm here because I have some God complex to save you? I saved you and took you to the hospital because I'm a decent human being," he explains lowering his face to my level, with his looking straight into mine.

"All the people at school are fake with their fake problems and high school drama, but not you. You are real, Rue. You're the strongest person I've ever come across, and you're real. I want to get to know you, but you won't let anyone within arms reach of you. Why?" Kohl looks at me, his eyes piercing mine, searching mine. I can't stand to look, it's so powerful. He is so powerful- his smell, his voice. Instead I look down at my wrists captured in his strong hands.

I pull at my wrists as my eyes burn. His words are to much. I feel as if I'm riding a roller coaster too fast. Kohl's hands are so big that he takes both of my wrists in one, gripping my chin with the other.

"Look at me," he whispers, "please."

"What do you want from me, Kohl?" I force this out of my closing throat, and my voice cracks. This guy gives me no choice but to feel everything. Another wave of emotion rolls over me, and I, again, try at my wrists.

"Come eat dinner with me, please?" Red flag. What the hell?

"What, why?" I totally wasn't expecting that.

"Why not?" He asks.

"I don't need you to feed me. I can feed myself, Kohl." I push my hands again into his chest, his hard chest, as anger sparks through me.

"I know, but neither of us have had dinner, so why not?"

"Why not? Really? Is that how you get all the girls?" I can't help it, my voice drips with sarcasm. "I'm not going on a date with you."

"It's not a date. It's friends both eating dinner at the same time, and coincidentally at the same place." I see the corner of his lips tug up as if he can tell I'm thinking about it.