Painting Flowers For You

Make or Break?

Waking up, bright sunlight beating down on me. I stretched out, pinning my arms back as I felt my sweaty palms hit an unfamiliar body lying next to me. Pushing myself up, I realised the body next to me was in fact Calum's.

Did we fuck? No, shaking the thought from my head, even in my head it sounded absolutely ludicrous.

That event would never occur, as much as I wanted that to happen, I just couldn't see it happening. It sickened me to the core but that was the god forsaken truth; it would never happen.

I swung my legs out of what I now gathered to be Calum's bed. I slipped on his Santa Cruz muscle tee and my black yoga pants making a quick beeline for his bedroom door when a groggy morning voice that made my knees weak and my pants soak, stopped me in my tracks.

"Morning Leigh" said Calum. I replied with slight smile. Calum wasn't stupid, he knew something was up with me. He looked at me curiously and I shrugged and shook my head at him, denying him of what was wrong and denying myself of my feelings for the tan boy I happened to be in love with.

I opened the door of his bedroom and left for my room, tears spilling out of my eyes as soon as I shut the door of his room. I headed for my room when I bumped into a lean, slim, toned and tanned figure belonging to Mali, Calum's sister.

She embraced me into a hug and pulling me into her room as it was closer than my own room. When we were inside her room and certain Calum was back to sleep, she shut her door and looked at me sincerly.

"Leigh, is this what I think it is about?" she said. She knew. Of course she fucking knew. Did Joy? Did David? Fuck. Did everyone know?

All I could do was look up at her and nod my rag doll head, the only way for me to tell the truth.

Mali looked down at me pitifully and sat herself down next to me on her floor and handed me a tissue to dry my panda looking eyes. I smiled at her in gratitude, which was easier for me to show how grateful I was for her caring, and not just ignoring me.

"Leigh, he needs to know. You need to tell him how you feel. The more you hold it in, the harder your feelings will be able to control and before you know it, it will be too late. And none of us want that for you" she said nonchalantly, as much as I hated to admit it, I knew she was right.

"Leigh, I can see it in the way his eyes sparkle when you talk to him or when anybody mentions your name. You must be pretty fucking special to him because his eyes never sparkle, not even when mum makes him spaghetti when he has the incredible munchies. Just tell him before it's too late. He loves you Leigh" she continued.

"And I love him" I finished for her and she smiled. And for the first time this morning, so did I. Mali was so easy to talk to, I could tell her everything, she was like a big sister to me and not just Calum. She pushed me in the direction of her bedroom door which was hee way of getting me to tell Calum how I felt before I cried about it again.

"Ot's make or break Leigh. Take that chance" she said, the last words of comfort I heard from her before I stepped foot into Calum's room, ready
to confront him and the truth. Two things which I really didn't want to confront with my feelings.