FALLING

One

Why does life have to be so... 
Hard ?
Why does depression have to make me be so... Unhappy?
Stupid life.

***********

I woke up quickly to the sound of my alarm. I groaned, rolling off my bed.
Another day, another pain in my side.

You know those days where you feel like you just cannot get up? Yeah, that's everyday for me.

Living with depression is not an easy thing. It makes you feel like you're slowly dying in you own mind; slowly slipping into the darkness of your thoughts.

When I finally find it in me to get up, I lug myself over to my bathroom.
I brush my teeth and my knotty hair. I hate my hair... And my face... And everything else. It's sad, really. It is.

I put on (outfit at top) my flannel, black pants, boots, and a grey beanie. Slinging my book bag over my shoulder, I head down the creaky stairs of my house.

Walking into the kitchen, I am met with my mum making breakfast. I take a whiff and am met with the mouth-watering scent of pancakes and bacon. I moan. Bacon has always been my favorite.

I grab one piece and bite into it. I thank my mum and head out the door, hearing her call out, "I love you! Have a great day today!" I returned the 'love you' and get into my car. I start it up and head to my high school, dreading the day ahead of me.

*************************************

I park in my usual spot, but don't get out. My mind is suddenly racing with thoughts about the school.

We have so, so, so many different kinds of stereotypical cliques here.

We have your jocks, girl-jocks, geeks, band nerds, goths, emos, 'blessed', Show offs, sluts, the stoners and the popular people.

Sometimes, I just wonder where I might belong...