Behind Closed Doors-A Rydellington Short Story

Rather Hurt Than Feel Nothing

Rydel's POV:

"Well, congrats," Riker announced, tossing three magazines onto the kitchen table where we were all gathered one morning. "You made the cover of three major teen magazines in the country."

I spread the magazines out so they were next to each other and read the headlines that publicized my relationship with Ryan.

"Wow," Ryland flipped through one of them and skimmed the article about us. "This is actually working. The fans are loving it."

I looked to Ellington, who was sitting across from me, who silently looked out the window, distracting himself from seeing all of it.

I sighed and felt a wave of guilt wash over me. I always felt so bad whenever he saw or heard something about me and Ryan. I tried brushing it off, though, and pulled my attention back to my brothers.

"So this is good, right?" I interjected. "We can put an end to this stunt now that we've gotten the publicity we want?" I asked hopefully.

My brothers looked to each other then cast their gazes down, avoiding eye contact with me. Finally Ross was the one who spoke. "We think you should keep it up for a while longer."

My hopeful facial expression dropped and I felt my eyes pool with tears. I didn't let them spill over, though. I wouldn't cry here in front of my brothers and Ryan. I couldn't show them how much this was affecting me, both physically and emotionally. "Why?" I choked out the word, my voice cracking.

"The fans are just getting used to this idea," Rocky answered across the table, in the seat next to Ellington. "We can't end it as soon as it's begun."

"It hasn't just begun," I retorted, "We've been fake dating for a month and a half now."

Riker shook his head. "What he means is to them, it's hardly been any time at all. Just think, if we took it away, it could have the reverse impact that we want."

My eyes went wild and I looked around to each of them like they're crazy. "Did none of you think about this before? That when we do break up, they're not necessarily going to like it and could cause some publicity problems?" They looked down again. "How long do you want us to date? Another few months? A year?"

The silence was piercing until Riker softly replied, "I don't know."

Only then did Ryan, who was sitting next to me, turn and smirk. "I guess you're stuck with me indefinitely." He leaned closer to me as if he was going to kiss me on the cheek. I cringed in disgust and shoved his face away-probably a little too hard, but I knew it didn't hurt when he just chuckled in response. He thought this whole thing was just some big joke.

I turned my attention back to my brothers. "So what happens when I want to actually have a boyfriend? When I actually want to date somebody? What, I just keep fake dating Ryan for publicity and have a real boyfriend on the side?" I felt Ellington nudge my foot under the table, warning me not to go too far or say something I'd regret later. I understood, but it was still probably a good think he reminded me before things got out of control.

"Rydel, we don't think-," Ross began, but I cut him off.

"No, I don't care what you think," I stood up and folded my arms across my chest. "You guys got me into this mess. Now get me out of it."

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You awake? I texted Ellington that night, after everybody had gone to sleep but I just couldn't clear my mind and get any rest.

If you are, I am. He replied after a few seconds.

I smiled. Of course he was awake. That was all I needed to know. I crept out of my bunk and made my way to the back lounge area where he's been sleeping. I haven't gone and visited him back here in quite some time. I usually fell asleep before my brothers so there was no way Ellington and I could see each other at night.