fighting for what was ours : raura

✧ the cruel reality ✧

Sometimes i wished things would go back to how they were.

To change my past? No. To help my future? No.

Maybe too actually look at the reality that it is falling in love. the danger & heartbreaks that come with it before getting myself in it.

I can't say that I regret it, because I don't. I just wish I knew.

Knew that not everything would stay as the perfect little fairy tale it all seemed to be.

& it all started with one party.

Ross & I were invited to one of rylands friends parties & I couldn't be more ecstatic. Ross never wanted me to go to any of their "gatherings" because he said all they would do is sit around & get drunk.

But that night, I was excited Ross was finally doing something with me. He was so busy writing for the next album, we never seemed to hang out anymore.

I got ready that night feeling so excited. I didn't know what was coming for me.

I remember exactly what I had worn. A body fitting white dress with some white pumps.

I knew I would discard them later that night but I still made the effort to look presentable.

"You look so beautiful baby." Ross had said to me, planting a kiss on my forehead.

I smiled back, "you look very handsome too."

With that, I grabbed my purse & we were off.

When we got there, the place was packed. Not one single space left to park our car. Thus why we had to parks almost a block away.

Entering the house I could smell the alcohol, saw people grinding & making out.

I remember scrunching my nose in disgust before planting a fake smile on my face. It wasn't my type of environment but I wouldn't complain. It was the first time Ross & I had actually gone out in a long time, & I planned on enjoying.

some part of the night was spent dancing & drinking. But I wasn't drunk. I knew if Ross was going to get waisted, I was the only thing we had to get us back home.

a few hours later I had completely lost Ross out of my sight & I had a bad feeling in my gut.

I asked people all around if they had seen him but all said no. I asked a girl hanging out by the bathroom & she said she had seen him walk upstairs.

By then I was confused. Why would he need to go up there?
I thanked her & was on my way.

I walked up stairs dodging the half drunk teenagers making out and focused on finding Ross.

I look in the bathroom, a closet & a total of 3 rooms and no such luck.

When I checked the last room, I swear I felt my heart stop. Tears build up in my eyes at the sight of Ross & pretty brunette almost banging on the bed.

"Ross?" I whispered. He stopped kissing the brunette & turned to look at me with a drunken smile on his face.

"Heyyy babyy" he dragged out, walking over to me.