The Dagger of the Crows

Chapter one

I wipe the blood off my blade, dying the white curtain a deep shade of crimson. The room is dark except for the sliver light of the moon. I'm just able to make out the dark mahogany desk and ornate marble fireplace. The man lies crumpled on the floor, surrounded by his own blood, it pools around his head, dying his white hair red. A familiar knot ties in my stomach, I've taken another life. When I killed for the first time there were days when I couldn't get out of bed, days when I'd let the guilt eat me alive. Now I can kill and forget about it, forget about the victims family, the victims soul- and mine for that matter.
This man was killing the Crows, I remind myself as the guilt starts to gnaw on my already broken heart. The leader of The Crows Dagger has always told me that we lose a part of our selfs with each kill, each blade driven into a throat, a heart. Sighing, I drag the body over to the fireplace, it is only now that I can smell the metallic sent of the mans blood. There is closet next door containing a mop and bucket of murky gray water, I drag it into the silver lit office of the man I've just killed . I gag as I mop up the blood, no matter how many times I do this the sent of blood never becomes less toxic and repulsive.
The Crows are those in Tavon with magic, they can control you, take you continuousness, alter your memories, your toughs, and kill. The royal family considers them a treat, thinks that they are an abomination, hardly human, not worth life. I disagree with the royal family, so I kill those who have willingly and knowingly killed Crows, I have struck them down them down with my dagger.
I throw a match into the fire place and let the sent of burning flesh fill every breath, what once was a repulsive sent has become comforting, it reminds me that I've done something worth while with my time. Orange light fills the room and I can see everything more clearly, the papers piled high on the desk, the over stuffed gray armchairs, the leather chair behind the desk, the dark blue walls, the photograph of his wife. I shake my head, stop it Hana. I chant in the language of the Crows, the words I say will allow this man to cross over safely, weather it will actually work, I have no idea. Once the body has been reduced to ashes, I collect the bone fragments.
By this time of night the streets of Tavon are vacant, allowing me to walk undetected to our so called headquarters. My shadow is cast upon the street by the moon, my blade shines in its light as well.
When I reach headquarters the door is open, as usual. I turn the doors brass knob and let the sent of the house nose, soft hints of spice and candle wax, it smells like home. It is home. Nikolai approaches me, his usual smile lighting his face. "Is the job done?" He asks. I laugh dryly, "I'm not an armature." He puts his hands up, "I know, Your Highness." Annoyance pulses through my veins at being recognized as a part of that family. I see Mason across the room, Mason is one of the Crows and like many in The Crows Dagger, he's powerful. He's been here for as long as I have, perhaps longer. He's an assassin, like me, he trained me along with Nikolai - our leader.
Mason smiles devilishly when he sees me, "hello Hanna." I roll my eyes and sigh. "What do you want?" I ask, disdain drenching my every word. He brings his hand up to my face and wipes my cheek, there is now blood on his fingers. It must've got there when I killed that man. Mason smiles, "Hana, you really must learn to kill more cleanly, I thought we trained you well."
I give him a silvery smile,"I'm fine with getting a bit of blood on myself." I turn away, though my feet seam to stick to the flood, begging me to stay.
The palace contains only cruelty, only people with whom I do not belong. I must put up the face of a lady, a princess, a perfect daughter; I must put up the face of a polite, soft-spoken girl, someone un opinionated and un assuming. Over time my life has become a series of facades and lies, the only time I let the facade drop is when I kill, when I am acting as one of the Crows.
I turn the doorknob and walk out into the cold night once again. The moon looms above me in a starless sky, it is only light to be seen and my shadow is the only one cast upon the street. I take a deep breathe and cold air fills my lungs, I wrap my cloak tightly around myself. Winter air bites at my face, snow crunches beneath my boots as I walk alone in the dark. I welcome the solitude, it is moments like this when I can finally breath.
As I pass small village houses, I let myself wonder what their lives must be like and who the people are. Thoughts of a different life fill my head and I let them take me into my clutches, I imagine a life as a town girl, running through the streets as sun rises. Having a family that can laugh, a house that is warm. I smile feebly, knowing that that life is one I will never attain, I will always live in a cold, unforgiving world, one filled with cold cruel people.
The place looms before me, for a moment I consider asking the Crows if I can stay with them for a while. I shake my head, my father would come after me and kill them, I won't put them into that kind of danger. Sighing heavily, I open the iron doors. Inside the palace is lit by candles, there is enough light to see the ornate ceiling and dark tile floor. I remove my shoes before entering so that my foot fall will not wake anyone or rise suspicion. Walking slowly I make my way to my room, I trow the door open. Part of me has always hated this room, or what it means, it means that I truly am the princess of this forsaken land they call Tavon.
Red curtains cover the windows, blocking me from the rest of the world, the floor is dark wood that matches my four-poster bed, which is draped in dark grey sheets. The room is too big, multiple families could live here comfortably, I feel a familiar pang of guilt in my heart at how much I have and how much I wish I could give. I've always felt bad for the people who live on the streets, who only know thirst and hunger; despite all the trouble in their eyes, there is still hope for them.
Perhaps I'm wrong, perhaps they know hope is foolish, perhaps I hope for them more then they hope for themselves. With a light sigh I quiet my racing mind and begin once again to hide what I've done. A large trunk sits at the foot of my bed, I throw the lid open and dig through the blankets it contains. Blankets are strewn across the floor by the time I reach the bottom of trunk, I remove the bottom, revealing the rest if my weapons- the daggers, swords, and bows that become my friends.
For a moment I catch my reflection in the blade of a dagger, fierce green eyes stare back at me and my blond hair falls around my face. The ghost of a smile plays on my lips, not that I'm vain and that seeing myself gives me great pleasure, I smile because I no longer look like a little girl playing soldier.
I place the sword I used tonight back in its slot, stroking its deadly blade once more before placing the false bottom over them. Once I've plied the blankets in, I close the lid. I hide my blood stained clothes at the back of my closet where not even my maid, Jeannette, will find them. Satisfied, I climb into bed and lay there for a moment. Sleep begins to pull me away and I go willingly into its clutches, I let it feed me dreams.

Sunlight penetrates my eyes and they flutter open, I survey the room, the curtains are now open- that is all that's changed. Jeannette enters hold a tray with tea and a mug, despite my protests that I can manage perfectly well on my own, she still insists on bringing me tea every morning. She is kind, I've always thought, she smiles with a warmth that would seam strange on anyone else's face. "Good morning, Hana," she says softly as she sets a cup of hot tea on the table beside my bed. It took me forever to get her to refrain from calling me Your Highness, My Lady, or Miss Silvershade. "Good morning to you too, Jeannette," I take the tea off the night stand and take a sip. Jeannette's hand are fidgeting and her eyes are turned down, her hands tremble slightly, she's hiding something.
"Jeannette," I say, trying to seem nonchalant, "has something happened?" Her head jerks up and she lets out a trembling breath. "Nothing has happened," she says, her hand hovering near her mouth, she's lying. I shake my head, "I know your tells, you're hiding something." Jeannette runs a trembling hand through her auburn hair. "I don't know if I am allowed to say, your parents might-"
"My parents tell me nothing," I cut her off, my tone a little sharper then I intended. "They won't know you told me, besides, what's the harm in me knowing," something in my tone sounds desperate, as if this small piece of information may help me in my plans. Jeannette shakes her head, "it's better that your father tells you." I consider protesting but decide against it, I let Jeannette help me dress in a simple dark blue gown before going to my father.
My father sits in a dark leather chair behind his wooden desk plied high with papers. "Father?" I say, keeping my voice quiet, respectful, "Jeannette told me there was something you wished to say to me?" My father sighs heavily. "Sit, Hanna," he gestures to one of the chairs facing his desk. "You will soon be seventeen so it is time we start considering your future." I stare at him for a moment, confused. "What is it you're trying say?" My father looks me in the eyes, his eyes burn into me and for a moment I feel like he can see thoughts. He's not a Crow, I remind myself, he will never know what you're doing.
"I mean," he says, "that you will soon need a husband with whom to rule this kingdom." I can not stop myself from saying, "We've discussed this, I do not want a husband." My father sighs once more. "Hanna, this is non-negotiable." Part of me wants to fight, wants to tell him that I can do without a man by my side, that I am strong enough on my own. Telling him this will not change his mind, it will only anger him. Lips pursed, I rise from my seat and turn away form my father, I turn the door knob and step out of his office. Knowing all the soldiers and guards are on duty, I go to the training room and I can finally breath, I am in my element.
Where I shouldn't be is the same place I belong.