A substitute (Ziam fanfiction)

A.N: To all those beautiful people out there who read and commented and liked my stuff, I behold! HAVE FUN!!!

_____________________________________________________________________________

“Shut up bitch!” Harry shouted at the top of his lung. “Had I to know you were such a whore, I wouldn’t have kept you.” Said as he stomped out of the house, leaving Zayn with tears strained his face.

Has Zayn ever regretted taking such path, being such male prostitute so that all the cold hard words poured down on him mercilessly? No he hasn’t. Never had he have such thought, for if he hadn’t been a whore, he wouldn’t have met Harry, who willingly spent money on him.

Zayn gave up his job so he could be with Harry. What more could he ask for? He just needed someone to take care of him, hit him, yes, but also aleviate his pain with such gentle caress. He remembered, though, that Harry’s actual love was Louis who died 5 years ago in a car accident, that Zayn was nothing but a substitute.

This time, it seemed, Zayn made a terrible mistake. He actually gave his best friend Harry’s golden necklace so he could pay off his debt. It was Harry’s memorabilia. He didn’t know what had gone to his mind at that moment. Now Harry was mad. Zayn didn’t think he would come back.

“Mr. Malik, what happened?” The housekeeper, Liam Payne, eyed him shrewdly. “Are you ok?”

“Fine, mind your own business.” Somehow he couldn’t stand the feeling of having Liam’s eyes glued to him. Not that he hasn’t experienced that every day, it was that he was on the verge of breaking down. He didn’t want someone, especially Liam, to pity him, to judge him. He was a whore, right?

Liam was, you could say, his body guard. He was Louis’ friend. He was strong and fit. He had eyes that could melt. He had arms that could crush. He had a heart everyone desires. But he has objected Zayn when Harry first brought him home. They even got into fights when Liam bad-mouthed about how unfaithful Harry was to Louis. And that was the moment Zayn knew the truth, that he was just someone who bears resemblance to Louis. From that point on, Liam had some kind of sympathy towards him.  He has always been on his side. Maybe Zayn was like his old best friend.

“You know you can always lean on me.” Liam reassured him, taking a step forward and reaching Zayn with a tip of his fingers.

“But I don’t want to.” Zayn could feel the heaviness in his eyes. “Go, Liam. Don’t pity me.” No. Don’t go. I’m just afraid I might fall for you.

Liam shook his head. With his head bowed, he left the room, left Zayn standing alone with two strains of tears down his face.

Everyday Harry was not home suffocated Zayn. He missed all those time clinging onto each other, snogging, fucking. And after that, Harry would buy him something decent. Harry was someone who could afford him food and accessories, someone who Zayn has always dreamed of having... Liam was not, however. He was poor. He was just an undergraduate. Without Louis’ being in this world, perhaps he wouldn’t make it. But Zayn’s heart ached whenever he saw those eyes catching Harry’s and his making out. And now he had to spend so much time with Liam when Harry was away to who-know-where.

“Do you want some tea?” Liam offered as he finished observing Zayn’s bloodshot eyes.

Zayn wouldn’t answer.

Minutes later, Liam came up with something else. “Are you eating home or going to the restaurant?”

Zayn clenched his jaws, unable to answer. Eating home was too lonely at this time and Harry kept all the money.

“I’ll pay.” It was as if Liam could read his mind. Zayn groaned in distress.

“NO! NO! NO! AND NO! I DON’T WANT TO EAT UNTIL HE IS HOME.” He scolded.

“You know he wouldn’t be home soon. You want to die waiting?”

“If that’s the last thing I could do. Now can you shut up?” Zayn shouted and locked his room.

It was 3 nights without decent food. Zayn started to feel stupid for refusing such offer. His stomach begged for mercy. Instead of pleasing it, he just sat there and stared at the four walls. He wished Liam had insisted.

There was a knock on the door.

“Mr.Malik. I bring food for you.” Liam’s voice resonated. Zayn’s tummy began to jump for joy. “I’ll just leave it here if you want to eat.”

What? He’s leaving? “WAIT!” The next thing he knew, Zayn was at the door calling out for Liam’s back.

…

“How long since you last slept?” Liam observed as Zayn tried to absorb the food.

Zayn stopped for a moment and then returned to eating without saying a word.

“Harry wouldn’t care, y’know. It was the same case with Louis. He was always out late, burying in work. I asked Louis to break up with him, but he couldn’t. They are truly in love.” Liam whispered the last sentence.

I don’t actually care you know. All I want is breakfast, lunch, dinner, and midnight snack, sometimes a little sex I guess.

“Louis died on the way to his company, bringing him flowers for their anniversary. He forgot it but Louis didn’t.” Liam’s voice cracked. His eyes became teary.

“Why must you tell me this?” Zayn angrily burst out. Maybe Liam thought he was the same as Louis, totally in love with Harry. Maybe Liam was trying to prevent him from getting injured like Louis. Maybe in the end, he is really just another Louis that everyone loves.

But contrary to his belief, Liam’s next sentence blurted out. “I know you’re not Louis. I know you didn’t love Harry with all your heart. That’s the reason you must leave. Harry doesn’t know love. Maybe he does love you, but the way he does will only cause you bruises. Louis could accept it because he thinks his love would stand the test. But you, Zayn, it doesn’t deserve such sacrifice.” Liam stared at his eyes now. “You can not live on material, Zayn. You have to find your true love.”

“How do you know it’s not love?” Zayn asked him easily, as if he saw that coming.

“I look into your eyes and I feel  the heat. You love me, don’t you?” Liam pressed his lips into a thin white line.

Perflexed, Zayn put up some defense. “I-I don’t- know.”

Liam shrugged it off. “I found a house. I found a job that would earn me and you a living. I quit school. Soon enough, I will quit this place as well. If you know the answer, come to me anytime ok?”

Zayn stared dumstruck. Liam will leave? Liam, please don’t go. But Liam took off on his feet.

“Liam, can you stay with me one night?” Zayn pleaded. He couldn’t believe he actually said that.

Liam was caught by surprise. He smiled gently. “Sure.”

They just cuddled up. Liam felt so warm. He put him under the cover without even trying. Zayn had nightmare, but when Liam planted a kiss on his forehead, the creases eased and Zayn dreamt of a garden and a small house.