Blonde Jokes/Moments ;D

Blonde Jokes!

Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman?

A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head!

A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear.

Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?"

"The sucker called again!"

Q. Why was the blonde in the tree?

A. Because she was raking up the leaves!

A blonde comes home from a day of shopping and discovers that her house is on fire, so she calls the fire department on her cell phone.

"Please state the nature of your emergency," says the operator.

"Help! My house is on fire!" the blonde replies.

"Okay, where do you live?"

"In a house you silly billy!" the blonde replies.

"No,no! How do we get there?" the operator asks fustratedly.

"Duh! Big Red Truck!!"

One day 2 blondes decided to drive to Disney Land. When they saw a sign that said 'Disney Land left' they turned around and went home.

A blonde goes into a Best Buy. She asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.

The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing and again the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.

Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. The blonde asks the clerk, "How do you know I am a blonde?"

The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV - it's a microwave."

A. Why do blondes always smile during lightning storms?

Q. They think their picture is being taken.

A man was trimming his bushes. His neighbor (the blonde) walks out, checks her mail only to see that it's empty, and goes back inside.

Five minutes later, she comes back out, checks her mail again only to see that it's still empty, and goes back in.

The third time she comes out, the man asks her, "Excuse me, is there a problem?"

The blonde replies, "Darn right there's a problem! My computer keeps on telling me 'I've got mail'!"

A. Why can't Blondes dial 911?

Q. They can't find the 11 on the phone!

A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. Then one day she comes home and finds her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"

Did you hear about the two Blondes that were found frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theater?

They went to see "Closed for Winter".